No knots

Yuri update day 2

2012-02-29T16:32:00.001-08:00

Yuri is home now, thank goodness. He is in some pain but Michelle says there's NO snot!! And if you know Yuri you know the lil guy can produce an amazing amount of snot.

I can't wait to see how good he is gonna do and feel once he recovers. I can't tell you how happy I am that Michelle found doctors that were able to diagnose and help Yuri. Praise the Lord!! Great thing He continues to do.

Latest from Michelle: "Oh my goodness...yuri is walking all over the place. His ears were so full of junk that it messed up his balance...but he is walking...i cant believe it"

Yuri Update

2012-02-28T17:08:00.001-08:00

Here is the update I got from Michelle. Praise be to God!!

"Yuri is doing great. The ent said in all his years he has never seen such bad sinus. His tonsils and adnoids were so swollen that they were completely blocking his throat. That is why he had so much snot in his nose bc it had no where else to drain. His ears were full of crud and when he got out of surgery he no longer held toys to his ears. He could actually hear the music while the toy was laying on the bed. He is hurting...but he has to feel so much better. He is in icu and hopefully will be discharged tomorrow",

Prayers for Yuri

2012-02-28T09:07:00.001-08:00

Little man is having his adenoids and tonsils taken out today. This him in the hospital. Doesn't he look great!!

Michelle is just awesome!! And he is thriving. I got to talk to him on the phone the other day and he blew me kisses! Awww!

God is so good! Please pray for a successful and uneventful surgery. I will keep you posted as Michelle keeps me updated.

Thanks for ALL your prayers!!

Praise the Lord!!

2012-02-27T17:52:00.001-08:00

We got it!! I actually felt like I was witnessing a miracle. Thank you Jesus!!
Thank you for all your prayers!! It is such a weight that has been lifted. Now we wait for the results :-)

I'm sorry I haven't updated until now, it is has been an absolutely CRAZY day.

Bohdan Prayer Request

2012-02-24T15:09:00.000-08:00

I know this may seem trivial but we are desperate. We have been trying to draw blood from Bohdan for a very important test since October, yes you read that correctly October. We have been to 4 different lab companies and 6 different phlebotomists.

We are scheduled to try again Monday morning at 7:30am. Please pray that he (Walker, the phlebotomist) is able to get all the blood they need for the test. And that we will process the blood correctly and not have to redo any part of the test later.

Thank you all for your prayers!! It is a good feeling to have such a large body of Christ to help support us in prayer. Blesings to you all.

Family update

2012-02-20T15:52:00.000-08:00

Just a quick update about what is going on around here. We have been dealing with the crud that has been going around. Of course we don't all have it at once we have been taking turns and sharing. Big news is that the boys have all started swim classes and they are enjoying them for the most part. :o) Caius and Bohdan are in the Mommy and me classes, on separate days obviously since there is only one Momma. Asher is in a preschool class and is learning to be comfortable in the water. It has only been a few weeks and all the boys are already showing much improvement. Now onto the pictures....

I got a new litter box cover for the cat. Josh put it together and not a moment later we couldn't find Bohdan. Hmmmmmm?

All the kids are loving this new 'toy'. {sigh} Asher will cram one of the lils in there with all his cars or blocks and they all just giggle.

Bohdan has a new nickname "Gargoyle". You never know where he will be perched. He can now climb and he get on the train table, the play table, the fireplace and all the couches. He is doing so good. He needs a little stool to get on the couch and the other day the stool was in the middle of the floor so he went and got it. Pushed it to the couch and climbed on. The lil stinker has also figured out the remote to the TV and will turn on another show if his current show turns off. I did not teach him this, he is amazingly smart!!

The question is "If Caius gets a hold of a marker, can he get the lid off?" The answer "YES!!" Oi!

After we washed the green marker off.

They were holding hands a watching a show when I saw them. Of course a camera means 'stop everything cute you were doing.' its still a cute pic though.

Absolutely gorgeous!!

This was later that afternoon. He was SO tired he fell asleep on the couch. Poor baby!

And I will leave you will Ash on chocolate cake!

Kori's Story

2012-01-31T14:56:00.000-08:00

I'm sharing this from a friend's blog. The question is often asked "Why adopt from overseas when you can adopt a child with special needs here?" Well here is a reason or two....

Kori's Story

Sometimes adoption breaks a Mama's heart so badly that the words cannot come for a very long time. Sometimes what is seen and experienced is so gut-wrenching that it takes time and distance to begin to heal the pain. Sometimes.

A little over a year ago a Mama and Papa crossed the ocean to get a little Reece's Rainbow angel. They knew she had been transferred. They knew. But knowing and seeing are two very different things. Last year they discovered what transfer meant for their precious treasure. It was unbearably hard. While there their eyes were opened to the plight of special needs children in that place. We followed their journey closely as we had just come home with Aaron and understood on many levels the agony they were experiencing. We prayed for them, encouraged them, did whatever we could from afar to support them. Unlike our experience, they were not in a completely closed facility and were able to walk the halls of the mental institute and touch the other children. They learned their names and fell in love with them bit by bit, day by day. In doing so their hearts were broken over and over and over again.

But when the time is right... then the story needs to be told. And it is time for Kori Maria's story to be told.

I feel privileged indeed that Kori's Mama, Anna, has allowed me to share here on this blog some of the words that took so long to come. I am honored to call her friend. I am grateful for the ties that have knit our hearts together as we grieve for all the hidden children left behind.

This is Kori's story...
----------------------------------------

The doors open. We are treated to tea and cookies and treats in the director’s office. Afterwards they walk us to meet the person we had been waiting so long to see. Doors swing open left and right. Joshua, barely able to keep from vomiting. Something about the unusual smells and triggers he is unprepared to face. People of all ages and levels of disability stand. And watch. And one after the other speaks the word: “Amerikanskis”.

The word multiplies and follows us like the roar of a huge wave. No one believes that these Americans have come to their mental institution. Could it be true? Are they coming to adopt a child from HERE??

Plastic slippers. Flickering TV screens. Oriental rugs. Old drafty windows. People with Down Syndrome. Cerebral Palsy. Cleft Palate. Deformities. Mental illness. Hidden from society, where only the perfect are welcome. Discarded. Unwanted. Alone. Day after day here, never leaving this building.

She sits in a ball pit with colorful toys surrounding her. The six month old baby with the sweet little hat that makes her look like a little old lady. Her eyes crossing. Cute. Now where is Masha?

But wait. This is an Eastern European mental institution. They only take ages 4 and up. A second look. There is no freaking way.

There is no way in heaven or hell that this can be…..she is almost eight……

I drop to my knees, grab the tiniest baby hands and stare into the eyes of the eight year old trapped in a body no larger than that of a small six month old infant. What in the name of God….

“Masha. It is Mama. Mama is here”.

I manage to say these words while the room suddenly fills with caregivers. People in white coats. Women weeping. So many crying women. I ask permission to lift her out of the ball pit and she immediately rests her weary head against my shoulder as if to say : "You have finally come. I assume this is what kids like me do with ladies like you.”

I tell her : "Hi beautiful princess” and a caregiver behind me bursts into tears. “Princessa Masha!” she exclaims, now crying so hard that I am worried for her for a moment.

We are asked if we will accept the referral of this child. We accept.

And as we spend a month daily visiting her in the only home that has cared for this beautiful small girl after she aged out of the baby orphanage, we learn about the reality of the imperfect people in this country. Beautiful people. Tucked away as far from society as possible. Out of sight. Out of mind.

We walked among angels. The souls that live out their lives under these conditions have left their indelible mark on mine. Their faces. I see their eyes. I still see their eyes.

I saw the children in their "bedridden" room in their beds alone, begging for some attention and love. The small guy with his hands tied in a cloth. I saw the old building that needs so much work. I saw the older children with CP scooting on all fours down the hall, too old for adoption and no hope of a life outside of that institution.

I sat on those couches with some of the teenage girls who brushed my hair...and held my hands...and got hugs and kisses... I called them Princess V., and Princess I. (and all the other beautiful names of all those sweet kids) I went on this adoption trip with some rings and necklaces, and the girls wore them proudly. They learned some English....but I hope that most of all they learned what love is. My heart broke leaving them.. Every day when I got Kori from her room, I blew kisses at the children there and I said my "pryvet" to each and every one of them there. The smiles were priceless.

------------------------------------------------

When we got to the institution after court, the director's assistant ( who was in court with us to represent the institution) was very happy and told the director that we had passed court.

We went upstairs and they brought Kori to us. While playing, we noticed that a number of children were being walked down the hall in nice outfits. Maybe it was a holiday?

One by one the children were being photographed. We stood, we watched. We were amazed. Kori's adoption had made them realize that people DO want these kids and permission was granted to list them. Every single one that was legally available. They were being photographed for their adoption listing. I wish I could have gotten video of this. The excitement. The joy. It was contagious. As the pictures were being snapped, we stood there and clapped and yelled: "Horosho!" (good) along with the caregivers. Random caregivers stopped by and showed us their little ones and asked us to bring them home too. Doors were being opened and the joy on the faces of the caregivers was wonderful beyond words.

-------------------------------------

Within 24 hours of Kori leaving the mental institute she had a seizure. It is common for European mental institutes to sedate some of the residents, and although no one could say for sure, it was suspected that Kori's seizure was related to sudden withdrawal of sedative medication. After a day or two without the drugs, while still in country, her tiny nearly eight year old body could not handle the sudden change and she began to seize. An ambulance was called. The EMT's called hospital after hospital, trying to find one that would agree to take Kori and treat her.

They were turned down at four hospitals. She was not wanted. Finally, after negotiations, the last hospital relented and decided to admit Kori.

-----------------------------------------------

Time stood still. Seconds seemed like minutes, minutes seemed like hours. We had adopted her and had only had her in our custody for about 24 hours. Her little body shook violently in my arms. She gasped for air over and over. Her eyes rolled back in her head. Our daughter was having a massive seizure. I feared that this was it. That she was going to die before she would ever meet her brothers. She would quite possibly never experience more than just a 12 hour train ride, cradled in the arms of her daddy.

It would be twenty minutes before the ambulance would get there.When the ambulance finally arrived the seizure was over. Kori was lethargic and weak. The EMT ladies placed her on the bed and undressed her. Apparently her temperature was extremely low. They gave her several injections and then the yelling began. One of the women argued loudly with our facilitator. I could tell it was about Kori’s condition. I am sure this was a shock to them.

A seven year old child with Down Syndrome who weighed 16 pounds and looked exactly like a 7 month old infant. Her eyes infected. Her teeth so rotten that the smell was noticeable even from a distance. Her legs limp and stick like.

I experienced first hand the disgusted look the EMS people gave my little girl. The way they left her barely clothed on the bed. The way they spoke the words: "Down Syndrome'', spitting them out with anger and repeating over and over. We were unfit parents and she should have remained in her institution. Five hospitals refused her medical care. My facilitator held her hand out for 200 hrivna bills more times than I can count at the hospital that finally admitted her. That money was paid to the doctor, to the nurses, as "incentive money". One nurse was especially horrible to Kori and caused her pain on purpose. My facilitator met her in the hallway and handed her a 200 hrivna bill in exchange for humane treatment for my daughter.

---------------------------------------------

I used to say I could never go back. After she had a seizure in the city, and we witnessed first hand exactly how poorly people with Down Syndrome are treated, I thought I could never ever set foot in that country again.

On days like today though, all I want is to go back. To sit on that couch in the hallway. I long to hold the children I came to love while I was there. I want to tell them they matter. Oh, how they matter. I want to simply walk the halls and make eye contact with the forgotten. I see you. And you. And you. And you. Who will see? How can I make people SEE?? See these amazing spirits, these survivors, these quietly fading people?

The baby "princessa" has been home a year.

Yet, my heart is still somewhere in that mental institution. It wanders the halls, looking for a way to reach, to comfort. And that is fine.

Because I don’t seem to really need a heart here. It seems that money and material goods are considered enough around these parts, here in this country we call home. We stuff ourselves and we indulge, while people right under our very noses are in need of our help. Our love. Hope. I want to walk those halls, one more time. If it only shows one person that they matter, that they have infinite value, then it is worth it.

Kori Maria. You are very much worth it.

So very much worth it.

P.S. Please do not remove any of these pictures from this blogpost. You may link and share but do not remove the pictures. Thank you.

Mohawk!

2012-01-22T12:20:00.001-08:00

Since I have had many a request for Bohdan to sport a Mohawk.... This is what he looked like for church today. Yay!!

Oh me...

2012-01-09T14:58:00.000-08:00

...of little faith. I got a comment on the HELP! post that said they were happy to see Valentin on the 'My Family Found Me' page. At first I thought, oh they must be confused since it probably hasn't been all sorted out on-line.. Oh me! Then I had to check for myself just to make sure and would you believe it!!!

We serve a mighty mighty GOD!! Valentin is on the "My Family Found Me" page. He is! Check it out!! I'm so excited I'm gonna pee my pants, but I won't since I clean up enough of that ALL day long :-)

Anyway, meet the Ashtons !! Thank you to everyone who gave to Valentin's grant and I encourage you to consider giving to the Ashton's Family Sponsorship Page, even if it is just $10 every little bit helps to raise the ransom to save this little boy. I'm going there now!!

The sweetest thing

2012-01-03T07:44:00.000-08:00

Ok let me preface the is by saying that Bohdan is stinkin' smart. He plays the app "First Words" on the Ipad with intent and little to no mistakes. He also picks up on things quickly and waves and blows kisses when we ask. But......

This morning I got him out of his crib and we cuddled and laughed a bit then I put him on the changing table to get ready. He had the biggest grin on his face and then he blew me a kiss. Totally his own idea. What a sweetie!!

BTW, in regards to the epic Santa Claus picture. That Santa was awesome. He didn't even flinch when Caius was screaming and Bohdan was pulling on his beard!!

Our Christmas 2011 in pics

2012-01-02T13:42:00.000-08:00

Asher got a couple large John Deer trucks from his great grandparents and they are a hit.

Thank you Granma and Papa!!

So Bohdan has learned give kisses and Man is he good at it!!

He especially loves kissing his great Papa!

"Santa" brought Asher a basketball hoop and boy did the big guys love it. I mean Ash did too but he didn't really get to play with it much. It got set up in the kitchen and the men played many a round of 'horse'. It was/is a lot of fun!!

I don't think I shared this with you all yet. This is our boys Santa pic 2011. Classic right?

Caius' face says it all!

Bohdan got a Red Flyer swivel rider. Thank you Granny and Grumpy!!

He loves it!!

He was so proud of it!

Bohdan opening another gift. Notice he is still on his Red Flyer.

I just love this pic of Caius. So serious!

I was asleep when this happened. Promise. Asher wanted to go out in the snow SO bad. So he put on Daddy's boots and headed out. My brother saw him going and threw my sweatshirt on him. I love the pic.

This was later when we went out in the snow. He wore Granny's gloves. They were just a bit too big. Just a bit.

Uncle Andy and the twins.

Aunt Kat helping Bohdan open a gift. I'm not sure Bohdan understood at this point but he was excited none the less.

HELP!!

2012-01-01T10:14:00.000-08:00

There is power in prayer!

There is strength in numbers!!

Through Christ we can do anything!!!

I come to you today to ask for your help.

Remember this little guy? His name is Valentin and he is in the laying room. I got to spend a few moments with him when he was first transferred into the room. He was healthy looking, sweet, responsive and aware. He smiled for the camera and interacted with us. They even put Yuri into his crib and he was kind and gentle. That was a year ago.

If you ever wondered how bad that room is well here is the proof. The pic above was Valentin after a couple of months in the room and this is Valentin now.

A family went to visit Valentin and reported his condition. Friends.... the child they met is a completely different child than I met a year ago. He is head banging. Having screaming outburst for no reasons and has delayed terribly. The child I met was delayed from lack of stimulation but seemed cognitively fine. Now.... ?

How can this happen? In just under a year. Its not fair! Its maddening!! I'm sad! and angry! No child should ever be in that confounded room especially not him!

This family that got to meet him is a great family that have adopted before and have a large family that Valentin a year ago would have fit into great. However with all the new delays they felt that they couldn't give him what he needs so they are now focused on raising funds for him and finding him a family.

That is where you and I come in.

Requests:

#1 Please pray for this family. It is not an easy thing to go through all the paperwork, to fall in love with a picture only to get there and have everything be different than what you were told. I can't imagine how hard it is for them right now. Please continually keep them in your prayers

#2 Lets find a family for Valentin. How do we do this? Well first we pray and pray and pray our guts out. Second we increase his grant fund. There are so many families that want to adopt but are held back by that little old annoying thing called money.

Won't you please consider giving to his grant fund? Even just $10 will help. We could easily raise thousands of dollars if everyone just gave $10. Click here to donate. Plus any amount donated is tax deductible.

So what kind of family would be ideal? Well as you know kiddos coming from this room have serious issues to overcome just from the room not to mention any ailments they were born with so it is my personal opinion that Valentin needs a family with time. Time to help him recover. Time to love on him. Time to show him attention. Time to focus on him to help him heal and get back to boy I met a year ago and then learn and grow.

Here he is trying to color without the ability to do so. That sweet little boy is still in there. I know it!! Won't you help him! Valentin is 5 years old and facing the institution any day now. There he will surely be gone in more ways than we can comprehend. This is a very serious situation!

New yuri pics

2011-12-13T09:53:00.000-08:00

And they are SO cute!! He has grown up so much.

Check out Michelle's blog for the latest dose of cuteness!

Connecting the Rainbow

2011-12-11T15:15:00.001-08:00

4 years ago today this beautiful baby was born. He was born with something extra special, a third 21st chromosome. Learning your baby has Down's Syndrome is a crushing blow and I can't imagine with that information coming the recommendation to give that beautiful baby up. To hear how they are worthless, how they will never amount to anything and will only make your life, which is already difficult to say the least, harder. To hear that there is almost no choice in keeping the baby that you carried inside you for 9 months. I don't know what exactly happened when Bohdan was born but I can't imagine that it was easy for his parents to give him up.

We are so blessed in America so have the support systems that we have in place for those with special needs. There is so much we take for granted here like... handicap ramps and parking, our support groups like the Down's Syndrome Associations, the readily available therapies such as Early Intervention not to mention how it is not a rare thing to see those with a special need out in public. Where Bohdan is from none of these things are true. There aren't ramps at the end of the sidewalks, and you never see anyone with a special need out in public. Not to mention the fact that life is very hard there. Many parents struggle to feed their children and give them to the orphanage just so they know their children will get fed. Can you imagine making that choice?

So why am I telling you this? One thing I LOVE about Reece's Rainbow is that they not only strive to find homes for children with special needs in these countries but they travel to Bohdan's country every year to educate and teach people about DS. The more information this country has the more easily they will be able to set up support systems which will allow more children with SN to stay with their families in their own country. How cool is that!!

By giving to Reece's Rainbow Voice of Hope fund you are helping to Connect the Rainbow. Please consider this this holiday season.

Hodge Podge

2011-12-07T08:34:00.001-08:00

As I was going through my pics looking for the pics I had taken of Shawna and Lindsay in the orphanage I came across this pic of Bohdan. This was less than a year ago. Look at how small he was!! I digress.

I have GREAT news!! Remeber Lindsay and Shawna from the boy's orphanage? Well their Momma and Daddy are getting ready to head over there to meet them. Their SDA appoinment is the 14th of December. Here is their blog if you want to follow along. http://livingonhopeandprayers.blogspot.com/

Please pray for them.

I got to spend just a little bit of time with these girls and let me tell you, they are precious! Shawna is such a HAM!! She just kept posing for the pics and smiling and smiling!! I'm so excited to see these girls come home!

This is Valentin. He was transfered to the boy's room a few days before we busted the boys out. His family is on their way to go get him. Their SDA appointment is December 22. I'm so exctied to see another child get out of THAT room. If you would liketo follow along as his family travels to him here is the blog. http://www.findingthea.blogspot.com/

Our Thanksgiving was wonderful! I hope you all had a great one as well. I didn't get any good pics though. We have had some new developments though...... Drum roll please!!!!

Caius is eating ALL his food by mouth!!! Thank you Jesus!

Bohdan is pulling up to stand on EVERYTHING!

Caius is also pulling up to stand but is still crawling like a frog.

Bohdan is doing better about quad crawling and is building up his muscles. Which is why his pulling up is such a BIG deal. He doesn't have trunk muscles to support himself but he is working on it!!

Now we are working on both of them drinking liquids! Bohdan refuses to hold his own cup.

Ok I know this is supposed to be a blog about the babies but... Look at this pic! Josh and I got away last minute for a weekend so we went to Wolf Creek, Colorado and it was amazing!! The conditions were fabulous and we even remembered how to board even though we hadn't been on our boards for 8 years!! It was such a blessing to spend a few days alone with the love of my life!

Bohdan Bruce

2011-11-17T07:02:00.001-08:00

This is a post all about Mr. Bohdan. He is doing fabulous! He weighs a whopping 22 pounds!! (13 pounds in January). He is drinking from a sippy cup (I have to hold it tho). He gets all his calories from a spoon. He can stand with his braces on. He is quad crawling a lot! He loves to play and snuggle. He gives bunch of kisses and if you are doing dishes he will come and hug your leg unexpectedly. He is so precious!!

Weird thing he does is he fusses when we back into the driveway. I can back up and he just cries and cries, then I will pull forward and he stops, back up and he cries and cries. Then he will stop and put his arms up to get out of the car. (I dunno) Then the other wierd thing he does is he falls to pieces when a door shuts. Granted he goes through the house and shuts any door he wants but if anyone else does it is the end of the world. His bottom lip comes out, he burries his head in hands on the floor and sobs. We thought it was the noise but its not. The same thing happens if a door is quietly shut. We thought is was someone leaving but it's not. He can watch us walk to the door open it and shut it and he will fall to pieces. Only thing we can come up with is that he wants to GO!! He watches the doors and if they are cracked he makes a beeline for them, opens them and is gone. Through the back door he goes out to sit on the porch. Through the front door he goes out makes his way down the driveway then turns and heads down the side walk. He'll watch us watching him and it doesn't bother him as long as he is GOING! Too funny.

Mr. Hollywood

Blue Steel!!

Kisses? Anyone?

Is he not a gorgeous child? What a doll!!

CHEESE!!!! Mr. Personality!!

Green is a great color on him.

When he first came home he couldn't sit up... now he is quad crawling, not army crawling, everywhere!! Now he is working on standing and building up his trunk muscles.

He is SO handsome with his hair did.

Helping with laundry.

He LOVES watching the dryer at point blank range.

The twins fishing. Notice the fishing pole in Caius' hand. Bohdan was luring in the fish by throwing matchbox cars in the lake.

This is huge. Bohdan had never gone out on the grass. If I set him in it, he lifted his feet and fussed at me. Lately he has been going out on the back porch to just sit and watch the backyard. Then all of a sudden he got brave and took off out through the yard. If you will notice he is bare foot with shorts!! This pic was taken on the side of the house furthest from the porch. I'm SO proud of him.

And just in case you've forgot how far he has come..... This was less than a year ago. I remember I would have to prop him up on the couch because he didn't have the muscle to hold himself up. Thank you Lord Jesus for rescuing this angel!!!

Turn about is fair play

2011-10-28T09:23:00.000-07:00

Thank you so much for your comments. They made me cry. I can't tell you how much all your warm wishes and encouragment has helped me. I treasure you all!

On another note, Michelle just shared with me the coolest thing and a need that I thought I would share with ya'll. Michelle and some other Momma's that had adopted children from the same baby house got together to bless the children left behind. They wanted to send a Christmas box to each child in the baby house. Well the response to this was overwhelming!!! They got more than twice as many boxes than they had requested, enough to give Christmas boxes to every child in 3 different orphanges!! Praise God!!

Now they face the issue of raising the funds to mail these boxes overseas. They are sending them by boat so they need to get these out by November 7th. I think they only need $800 more to get this done. If you think this might be something you could help with please visit operationchristmasinnikolaev.blogspot.com.

Cool thing is that these Momma's are super organized and they set it up where any gift of $25 or more is tax deductible.

Anywho I will leave you with Bohdan's new thing.....

KISSING!!!

He loves giving kisses! He think it solves everything too. If we get on to him for something he will look at us and then pucker up like "you can't be upset with this face, can you?".

The story you have been waiting for.

2011-10-22T16:08:00.000-07:00

Sorry about the placement of pics. I am having super trouble with my blog. Also, Dianne you will need a kleenex.

So if you are a Christian I'm sure you have heard the saying "following Christ is hard." I heard this growing up my whole life. Having been raised in a legalistic church that saying always had to do with the choice between right and wrong. Now that I am a grown up (shhh, don't tell anyone) those words mean something completely different to me. Yes, sometimes following Christ is hard but for different reasons.

I feel like the Lord has taken us on a roller coaster journey these last couple of years. We didn't have to get on. We didn't have to say Yes but we did. Was it hard? ummm Yea! Was it heart breaking at times? Yea!! Did it hurt? Was I scared? Did I have doubts? YES, YES, YES... Can I see God's hand in all of this? Now....Yes. Is it rewarding? Absolutely. Would I do it again (say yes to a calling)? I certainly hope so.

So here is the story.....

Caius at 5 months, after 1st open heart surgery before G-tube

Caius was born Oct. 09. We were surprised to learn that he had Trisomy 21 and a MAJOR heart defect. We lived with congestive heart failure and pulmonary hypertension for 3 months. We spent most of those 3 months in different hospitals having to take 2 ambulance rides when things got really bad. It was during this time God planted the seed. A woman who I had never met came to visit us in the hospital from the local DS association. She shared with me that she had adopted a child with DS internationally through Reece's Rainbow. That was the first time I had heard about RR.

By chance, I started following Adeye's blog when she was bringing her girls home and also Lorraine's blog while Chrissie was in the hospital. I was just in awe of these two women, their faith and their strength. Josh and I had spoken about adopting but it was always in the future and never for sure.

Josh took me out on a date one night but since I was still pumping to give Caius breast milk and he was allergic to everything there was nothing I could eat (or drink for that matter) so we sat at the bar in the restaurant so we didn't take up a server's table (yes I was a waitress through college). Now God wouldn't talk to us while sitting at a bar, right? Oh let me tell you He can and He did. There were TVs everywhere and the largest screen had an expose on the orphan crisis in Haiti. Josh and I are reading the subtitles (the volume was off) and I'm balling my guts out. I look at Josh through my tears and say "God's funny huh?" Josh replied, "He sure is persistent." That was all that was said.

When Chrissie went to be with Jesus we attended her funeral. It was on the way there when I prayed a prayer that I remembered Lorraine saying she prayed. I prayed that my heart would break over what breaks God's heart. I feel this is an extreme prayer in today's society because we (me) are so desensitized to terrible, terrible things going on around us. I mean I would cry over Animal Planets Houston SPCA show but not over starving and dying children. hmm... Nothing miraculous happened after that, in fact the Lord didn't speak to me again about it until a few weeks later.

Adeye's pic of Yuri in orphanage

He did again through the famed "I left my heart there" post by Adeye. We were watching a show and I was surfing the web. I started crying as I read the post. I asked Josh to turn off the TV so I could read it to him. There we were balling our way through this post. We would stop and pray about what to do because the information was just too much to handle. I felt God tell me to ask Josh if we can adopt these boys. In my head I told God, "no, I'm not gonna ask cuz he will say no and then that is it, I won't be able to ask again. If I don't ask the possibility is still there."

Adeye's pic of Bohdan in orphanage

We read on. God told me to ask Josh again. I told God, no for the same reason. Two more times this happened and I finally gave in and asked. I wasn't completely obedient though. I asked Josh if we could fill out the paperwork to see if we were qualified to adopt. To my surprise he said "Yes."

The next day I called RR. I explained our situation about Caius and how he had another heart surgery coming up in a few months to completely repair his heart and how he was still on a feeding tube. To my dismay the lady at RR advised us to wait until after things settled down with Caius before we started the adoption process.

Adeye's pic of Yuri in orphanage

That next weekend was miserable. All we could think about were the boys in Adeye's post, Wade (Bohdan) and Yuri. I called RR back on Monday and explained that it might be smart to wait until after Caius' surgery but that we felt called to move forward anyway. So we did. We filled out the paperwork and were even approved for our home study even with everything going on. Yay!

So now the fundraising.... Where are the heck are we going $30,000!! Oh silly me. I had all these plans for fundraisers and I was getting them all ready. To start the beginning of our fundraising we sent out a letter advising of our intentions, introducing the boys and asking for help. Within 2 weeks of sending out these letters ALL the money had been given to us. Let me repeat this.... WITHIN 2 WEEKS ALL $30,000 HAD BEEN GIVEN TO US. To this day we have no idea who gave the largest sum which totaled 80% of the total amount. It was given anonymously to the church we had attended previously.

We have just recently found out how God was working with my family during this time. There are some people in my family that have the means to help us substantially but NONE of the funds came from them. They have recently told me that as they were praying about what to do that God told them to 'Be still' not only financially but also with their counsel. My Aunt in particular really wanted to help but didn't exactly agree with us bringing 2 special needs boys into our home at a time when we were already dealing with so much. She tells me that she really wanted to counsel us on the craziness that we were getting ourselves into and yet God wouldn't let her talk to us. She says there is no doubt in her mind that we were doing exactly what God wanted because of how He wouldn't let her try to talk sense into us. :o)

first time we met the boys December 2010

December 2010

We traveled in December and were gone through all the holidays. The condition of the children were rough and we wanted to get them out of there fast but fast was not in the cards. We were there 3 weeks. Visiting the orphanage was hard, it was exhausting mentally. I couldn't wait to get my boys home. I just knew everything would be better once we got home.

December 2010

My sister-in-law went back with me to get the boys after the 10 day wait period. We had 2 weeks in country and then a 43 hour trip home. It was misery. Then we get home and everyone goes on with their lives and their work and it is just me and the 4 boys. Two of which have just come from another country and are in shock, one of those having far more medical issues than we expected. Needless to say the next 6 months were the hardest of my life. I literally thought I wasn't going to make it. After seeing numerous specialist we finally found out what was going on with Yuri. But that didn't help us get him help.

March 2011

I spent most of my time trying to get him services, in school, therapies, a walker, Medicaid, anything that would help him and give me a break. But it was like there was a brick wall there and there was nothing I could do to get him help. On top of this, Yuri was aggressive towards the babies, Caius and Bohdan, mostly Bohdan. He would hit them or head butt their faces so they would cry and then he would lay on them to listen to them.

Asher stopped spending time with the family and spent the days by himself staying as far away from the new boys as possible. Rarely, he would interact with Bohdan and even try to pick Bohdan up if he went farther than Asher thought he should go but he wouldn't be around Yuri at all. Yuri destroyed the house. With his limited sight and lack of comprehension of toys, everything became a projectile, generally at one of the other children. With two kids not moblile yet it made things very hard. We rearranged the house, all of it, just to accommodate his needs. Not to mention, He threw up many times a day. Please understand that when I say threw up I mean it, not just spit up, projectile. I covered most of the rugs and things with multiple sheets to help with clean up.

April 2011

June 2011

This was not what I had envisioned for our family. Why wouldn't anything give? Why couldn't I get help for Yuri? Why wasn't the family meshing? Surely this isn't what God planned when He called us to these children. I was at a loss and I was defeated. My little human pea brain couldn't grasp anything other than I was a failure. I had failed God, I failed RR, I failed my family, and I failed my children. It was a terrible place to be.

It was so hard to contact RR about adoption disruption. I had contacted them previously a couple times asking for advice but this time it was different. I was contacting them specifically about disruption. Someone started using the word rehoming and that made me feel better. RR got me in contact with Rachel. A dear friend of mine whom I owe a lot. She talked and counseled with me for hours. She got me in touch with Michelle.

Michelle and her husband, Noah, had adopted three special needs children last year and now felt their calling was respite. Just to help families breath and sort out their feeling after an international adoption. This sounded good to me. I didn't want to give Yuri to a family forever. I just needed help and that is what she was offering. She was going to keep him for a month, help him get a walker and get on medicaid. This would give us time to breathe and regroup so when he came home we would be ready and hopefully he would have the services I was struggling to get him.

It was a good fit for us because Michelle and Noah DID NOT want to adopt again, so we didn't feel threatened that they might try to keep Yuri and if rehoming did seem to be the route we would take, then they could help us find a home suitable for him. Oh us funny humans!!! Keep in mind we were advised not to mention anything on the blog about this because believe it or not there are people out there who prey on families going through a hard time after an international adoption.

It was hard handing Yuri over but we felt at peace with them and both Josh and I seemed to 'click' Michelle and Noah. They are super great people so that made it easier.

Let me tell you about our house first with Yuri gone. Bohdan came out of his shell. There was a mischievous, darling, mouthy, curious child in there. I guess without his big brother there to stop him he had the courage to explore all life had to offer. Asher took a bit longer to recover. It took him about 2 weeks but then he was back to his normal self and spending time with the family. Josh and I felt relief. It was like a different house. There was such a peace in our home. Many people commented that the boys were different and the house was more calm. Imagine that calm with 3 small boys, ha!! Anyway, it was then we knew that Yuri wasn't supposed to be ours. But whose?

Now I will tell you about Yuri, he did throw up twice on Michelle's head as they were driving back home after picking him up (Sorry Michelle) but since then he hasn't thrown up. ?? He actually fell asleep on the car ride to their house. ?? He NEVER did that with us, in fact he generally yelled the whole time we were in cars. Within the week, she had him on medicaid and had him walking in a walker. By the end of 3 weeks he was eating his meals by mouth. ??? He was not doing this for us at all. I asked about him being aggressive towards her other children. She said he was twice to two different kids but it didn't work out so good since he is the smallest so now he doesn't even try. hmm... When he left us he was on a strict diet of no dairy!! To help keep down on the puking. But now at the end of the month he was eating dairy. ??? He was a different child and he was thriving!

Did his chemistry really change? Did his development really improve in such a short period of time? Did he really get all of the help in a month that I had failed to get him in 6 months? Really?? No, this was just God.

I shared with Michelle that we felt it would be best for our family to rehome Yuri. She then shared with us that they had fallen in love with Yuri and wanted to adopt him. So I guess the question would be... Did God really just do this?

Yuri, content. His eyes say so much

In my human pea brain, I put limits on God. Surely if he calls you to adopt a child then you get to raise that child, right? Surely, He wouldn't call you all the way across the world to a child that wasn't yours. Surely? Then Michelle said something to me that made it all come together. She told me that they had said they would NEVER go over there to adopt again, NEVER. She then told me 'thank you' for bringing her her son.

PEACE!! Now it all makes sense. Yuri is home with his real Momma and loving every minute. I went to visit a few weeks ago and Yuri was happy to see me but he preferred his Momma. It did my heart good to see him doing SO well. He had even gained about 5 lbs. He is a super chunk!!

Yuri and his Momma

Thank you all for your prayers and your patience for this post. I can't explain how heart wrenching it was to go through this ordeal and in the end to give up Yuri. I have just now gotten to the point of talking about it without balling the entire time. Now it is just a little balling. But I am SO happy that Yuri found his forever family. Thank you Lord!!!!

And yes, I will update about Mr. Bohdan shortly. He is doing great!!

Buddy Walk!

2011-09-26T12:32:00.000-07:00

Well the summer is officially over. We have been running around like wild people and finally are at home for a bit. Not that that means we aren't doing anything, of course. We are prepping for a garage sale this weekend and last weekend we did our first ever Buddy Walk. It was so much fun!! Here are some pics.

Josh and Nick manning the table.

They were just posing. I promise they were much more approachable than they look here.

Our new friend, Jessica.

She fell in love with Bohdan and cannnot wait to get her hands on her little one.

Asher showing off his new shirt. He wasn't excited about his back pack though.

The twins! I've decided it is an absolute impossibilty to get them both looking at the camera at the same time.

Bohdan and Jessica.

Our booth and the team!! (minus Josh and the boys)

An Angel tribute I put together. Do you notice whose pic is in the middle ornament? Sweet Sonya! she looks nothing like that now she home. She's been home 4 months now and is doing amazing!!

Daddy and Caius with his curls.

Daddy and Asher!

pics pics pics

2011-09-03T14:00:00.000-07:00

Wind plus swinging equals a great picture!

Asher playing with his Great Granma Pat!

Love...

Love Swinging!!!

Double Trouble Bath Time!!

Look who can stand!!!!

Bohdan getting therapy, err I mean playing!!! He loves the bucket!

Oh boy and his dog...

A beautiful thing!

Lollipop kid! (from the lollipop guild)

Whisks are the best toy. Bohdan loves it!

Mr. Gorgeous!

Who me?

This was last month before Bohdan's haircut.

Crazy that Bohdan is 6 months older than Asher.

Summer is for....

2011-08-08T13:29:00.000-07:00

..shoulder rides!

(photo used with Michelle's permission)

...Laying around with your dog!

Swimming!!!!

Riding carousels!

Asher absolutely had to ride the pig. He would jump off of it and run around the platform looking for the animal he wanted to ride. When he would make it all the way back around to the pig he would get so excited!! He would jump, point and laugh. Pigs, who knew! Bohdan wasn't as excited about the carousel. Here he is waiting on me....

Fishing!!

Hanging around!

New hats!

Haircuts!

and growing new teeth!

Where are we?

2011-07-18T05:54:00.000-07:00

I know, I know! I'm so sorry. It has been a crazy month. We are running around visiting family and have been out of town for a few weeks now. Problem is my laptop, or as I loving refer to it my mainframe cuz it weighs 13 pounds, sucks all the wireless internet out of the house where I'm trying to use it. Whether I'm on the internet or not! Frustrating! So I haven't been online and am feeling very disconnected. However, the Lord is doing some amazing stuff in our lives right now and I'm humbled to see His hand working.

I know some of you have come across the Enskats blog and are wondering what is going on! Well let me fill you in. For a few months we have been looking for respite for Yuri. I have been trying and trying to get him services, a walker, get him in school and have just hit walls left and right. Through RR rainbow I met an amazing woman who I swear is my long lost twin sister. We spoke a ton about Yuri, medicaid, services and such. She has provided respite to other families and offered to do this for us. After a lot of prayer, we decided to take her up on her offer. We met almost half way and got to meet her two oldest Hannah and Abby who were awesome little girls and SO great with the littles. Josh instantly clicked with her hubby and we couldn't get the guys to quit yapping so they could leave.

Anyway, Yuri connected instantly to Michelle and was completely comfortable. Which made it a little easier to see him drive away. Yuri has been with the Enskats for a few weeks now while we have been traveling around and he is thriving!! He fell asleep in the car for the first time EVER on their way home. He ate a whole apple and some carrots without them being pureed. He chewed and everything! He is already on medicaid and she is working on getting him a Kaye walker. I'm amazed at how well he is doing!! Check out their blog to see the latest pictures.

We serve an amazing God and I'm seeing His hand at work. Please pray for us, for Yuri, and for the Enskats.

With Yuri visiting the Enskats we have gotten to spend much more time with the other littles. Bohdan has really come out of his shell. He is one smart cookie and amazes us everyday. Our whole extended family has completely fallen head over heels in love with him and I'm not sure he has been put down on the floor in the last few weeks. He is definitely taking to this spoiling. Well I must go pack, so I will upload pictures next time.

Thanks for all your prayers, support and love.

PS.... I know many of you feel very attached to Yuri and are concerned for him. Please know we don't make any decisions lightly or without prayer. Also please understand that I can't share all the details on this blog due to shear time and privacy. Having said all of that, please keep your comments uplifting and supportive. As mom always said "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all." Thanks. :o)

Happy Birthday Bohdan!

2011-06-18T07:48:00.000-07:00

We celebrated Bohdans' birthday last Friday with many friends! Bohdan had no shortage of brothers to help him with the tedious job of candle blowing out.

Yes Asher did lick the cake. What are you gonna do?

He also blew out the candles before we sang to Bohdan, so we re lit them. Bohdan was amazed by the flame.

Look at his chunky cheeks!

After the candles were blown out again. Bohdan grabbed two hand fulls of icing! It didn't go over well.

Not well at all!

I tried to put some in his mouth but that was a no-go also.

Here is my lovie reading one of his cards.

Get ready for this next Picture. I found it but I can't recognize the child. I mean I KNOW who it is but THAT starved, frail, weak, tiny child is GONE and never to return. Thanks to God's Grace!

This was taken Dec. 2010. How anyone can say that adoption isn't REDEMPTION!! or that adoption isn't RESCUING!! That adoption isn't SAVING!! It is all of these things and it is LIFE CHANGING for everyone involved. It is awesome and humbling to see the changes in my boys. WE really do serve an amazing God!!!

cliff notes from the last two weeks

2011-06-13T07:38:00.000-07:00

This little guy is such a ham. He constantly has snot and food all over his face despite my best efforts but that doesn't stop him from smiling at the camera!

Bohdan opening his very first birthday present EVER!! This noisy elephant came from Granny and Grumpy. I love Bohdan's face. Priceless.

He liked it.

Yuri rarely takes naps and he refuses to keep toys in his crib. So after he throws them all out and finishes crying, he will lean back in the corner of his crib, while standing, and make funny loud noises. Problem is that he and Bohdan share a room. Poor Bohdan rarely sleeps at nap time. This day was particularly bad so I put him in Caius' crib. They played and talked for a while and then conked out. They are such sweet brothers.

This was Bohdan's last day of therapy with ECI. These are all his therapist who just adore him (as you can tell). Bohdan is just soakin in the love like it is no big deal. I'm so happy that Caius has the same therapist so they still come over.

So I was trying to take a picture of Bohdan's cap and gown from his graduation from ECI. As I'm trying to get a good shot this stinker is on my right side doing this trying to get the attention.

It took over 20 shots but here is Bohdan's 3 year old graduation from ECI picture. He's just thrilled. Can you tell?

My sweet Bohdan had his first birthday last Tuesday. We aren't going to have his party till this weekend. I got him a cake but I'm sure he won't touch it. We are still going to celebrate though. Celebrate the first birthday he has ever had with his family. Celebrate the first birthday that someone cared what day it was. He such a snuggly muffin!

I think the theme of the last two weeks have been geckos. Live, dead, with tails, without tails, dried, squishy, squashed, big, little, on the floor, on the walls, in the pantry, in the shower, unscathed, traumatized, the dog's pet, the cat's play toy, behind the pictures, on the ceiling..... shall I go on or do you get the picture. I am thinking about doing a daily count of geckos and the unfortunate circumstances I find them in. We shall see.

So I was out with the kiddos and I went to this store and saw a little girl waiting in the car in the parking lot with the worst look on her face. I got the strangest feeling. I left and went down the road but couldn't stop thinking about her. So as all normal people do, I went back to find her and ask her if she was ok. I passed the car, she was in, driving the other direction than I was going. I pull a u-turn and start following. Problem with me tailing someone is that I am not at all inconspicuous. I have a huge SUV that the previous owner decked out in chrome. I think you could see my car from space. No matter! there might be a little girl's life on the line. (ok typing this I realize how ridiculous it is but I just kept thinking about all the stories you hear about people seeing a missing child but not acting on their gut feelings. I would hope if any of my children we ever in trouble that some crazy bling SUV driving momma would act on her instincts.) Anyway, so I tail them down to their next stop. They pull in and I drive past and go to turn around. All the while planning my moves. I figured I would pull up and ask her if she was ok. If she said no then I was trying to figure out what I would do. First I thought I would pull up behind the car making a T shape and call the police. But then I thought that wouldn't be very smart because I have my babies in the car and I wouldn't want them hurt if the bad guy tried to push us over. (top heavy SUV) So then I thought I would make good use of the 4x4 option that we paid extra for and just pull up behind the car, bumper to bumper and call the police. That way if he tried to leave he couldn't out power my shiny beast and I would just gently push his car into the building so he couldn't leave. As I pull back around the building, I see her get out of the car and I realize I was totally wrong and she was fine. The Mission Impossible theme music playing in my head quickly faded.

Previous to this I had gone to Target with the boys. The day before I had successfully gone to Costco with all four and I was feeling pretty confident. Oh silly me.... It ended with me pulling a basket and pushing a stroller with 4 screaming fussies down the main isle while everyone parted like the red seas and watched me go by with pity oozing from their faces. But that wasn't the worst part. As I was in the farthest corner of the store from the bathroom, I realize that I need to go and I need to go now. Asher is looking at the toys and protested leaving so quickly. I fight him into the cart and briskly walk to the restroom with my baby-train. I park the cart next to the wall move all the babies to the stroller. The twins are mad cuz they are 'too big' to sit in the same seat and Yuri, no doubt feeling my urgency, straightens his legs so I can't get him in the stroller. oi!! We finally get into the bathroom and not a moment to soon. And there is a whole line of stalls with open doors except the end stall. The handicap stall. The only stall that we can fit in has someone is in it. I'm dancing at this point, so I say to Asher, 'We need to wait for the big stall so we can go Tee Tee'. Hoping that my words translate to the woman occupying the stall as 'get out now'. But my words are lost in the chasm of open stalls. And she starts rummaging through her purse. With no other choice, I go to the first stall and pull the stoller into the opening. The babies lose site of me while I'm try to get Ash and myself in and they don't like this at all and start fussing. I open the door so they can see me and proceed to do the business that brought us to this awful place. Right about then another woman enters the bathroom and can see the whole thing. I just give her the look and shrug my shoulders as if to say, 'sorry your getting a show but I have no other choice'. About then the other women comes out of the stall and guess what. She wasn't handicap, she didn't have a baby or four, she didn't have a stroller, she had no reason to be in there. She proceeds to do her makeup in the mirror and then after a few minutes she leaves with not so much as a glance our way. I meanwhile am still in my open cramped stall trying to keep Asher off the floor. I don't think I have ever wanted to make a citizens arrest so badly. Problem is I'm not sure that using the handicap stall without probable cause would stand up in court. But it would make me feel better.

So here is my public service announcement of the day..... Please don't use the handicap stall of the restroom unless you are handicap, have young children, or a stroller (baby present of course).

On another note, last Thursday we were blessed by the youth from our church who came and mowed our grass, did the dishes, laundry, replaced the pet door, took down the bed in Yuri and Bohdan's room so they have more space. They cleaned and watered plants and played with the babies and loved on the babies. It was wonderful!! They got SO much done. I think I have found everything that we lost just due to having so many people in the house putting things away. The only thing I can't find is my wedding band. Please pray I can find it. I'm going to take my whole bedroom apart later.

Thank you to all you stalkers :0) who helped me find the family who had emailed me. I was able to reply to her and hopefully help.

Thank you to everyone who gave me advice on Yuri's thyroid meds. He is doing so much better about taking it. I crush it and put it on a spoonful of baby food or coconut yogurt and he takes it. then I give him his juice bottle which is mostly water and the last few days he has actually been drinking it all. Yippee!! Plus he has no side effects to the meds. Thank you Jesus!!!

Who is traveling right now?

2011-06-08T06:04:00.001-07:00

Who is in country right now?

Someone sent me an email regarding the trip home with Yuri. Asking how we made it and what we gave him. I would REALLY like to respond to you but I can't find the message. PLEASE send it again. Sorry.

Long awaited post

2011-06-05T13:34:00.000-07:00

Sorry it has taken me so long to post. Things have been a wee bit crazy. Praise the Lord! Kirill is with his Mommy and Daddy and is coming home! Thank you Jesus. Here is the last few weeks in pics.

We went swimming yesterday. Yuri didn't like to wear the glasses but he seemed not to react to the sun as much. I think with time they won't bother him at all. He had a good time. He ultimately threw up in the pool but what are ya gonna do. I had planned for all the other possibilities. He was wearing two swim diapers under his bathing suit and I was staying on top of his boogers but how do you plan for puke. He has been doing much better about throwing up but he swallowed too much water while swimming.

Yuri and Bohdan getting a bath. Yuri's face cracks me up in this pic.

Little Bohdan was too busy splashing to smile for the camera. He loves loves LOVES splashing in the water. As a matter of fact all our animals are dying of dehydration because if their water bowl has water in it he finds it and plays and splashes until it doesn't.

I love the progression of looks on Yuri's face. He is such a ham for the camera.

Caius isn't crawling yet but he is mobile. He scoots and rolls everywhere. And sometimes get stuck underneath things.

Josh's cousin graduated two weekends ago so Ash and I flew to Lubbock. We got to see some of my family and Josh's family. Asher LOVES his Uncle Andy, my brother. Here we are walking into the church for the graduation.

Asher didn't want to stop and take a pic.

Asher was really fussy while swimming, so his great granma Pat rescued him and he went right to sleep. She didn't let her broken arm stop her from holding her baby!

Here is Asher and Andy again. Too cute!

I think they wrestled 90% of the time.

So Bohdan is a snuggle bug. He wants to be with people all the time and likes to be held. Josh was putting up clothes on Saturday and Bohdan was following him around. So Josh put him in the Moby wrap and carried him around.

Problem with men carrying babies is that they are too practical. I walked into the boys room to find empty hangers hanging off one side of Bohdan and the shirts that were on hangers hanging off the other side. Notice Bohdan laid back looking at his Daddy. What a big help Bohdan was.

When I got back from the graduation I found myself with no babyfood for the bottles and NO diapers! Yikes! So I and all four boys went to Costco. It was a good trip but we get alot of comments and stares. But we stocked up on food. I then had to cook it all make this bags that I use to make the boys bottles. It took 3 days and two late nights but we are stocked up for at least a month. This was the second batch. I'm glad Josh was here to carry it to the freezer.

It was funny at Costco. I was buying a box of wipes and there was another Mom there grabbing the wipes at the same time. She said, "These things are awesome! My friend said a box lasted her 6 months!" I smiled and said yes they are great but a box only lasts me about two weeks. :0)

I'm getting the feeling I change ALOT of diapers.

Pray for Kirill

2011-05-23T17:32:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is the big day. Kirill's mommy and daddy are going before the supreme court to plead their case. Please pray for all involved! The judge who denied them said if the Supreme court says ok then she will overturn her ruling. Please start praying at 6:10 am CST tomorrow. Here is the link to their blog.

Also some updates on other #3 orphanage babies. Julia, from the boy's room is in the hospital with re-feeding syndrome. Her body had shut down due to malnourishment. Carey says she is doing better and handling her feeds well. I pray she can go home soon. Click here for updates.

Sonya and Dusty who just got home, were sent from their pediatrician's office to the hospital. Please pray for them as well. Click here for pics and updates.

Plus I have some inside information about Shawna and Lindsay but nothing is certain yet. Please pray for them and their future family/ies. They are both 7 and will probably be transferred in the fall. :0(

Concerning Yuri

2011-05-23T14:07:00.000-07:00

As before, I will lead with pictures and save the boring stuff for last. :o)

Handsome Yuri loves swinging.

He is such a little munch-kin!

Somebody else like swinging too!

Look at his curls! He looks like kid from the lollipop guild.

More child labor.

Caius James swinging and lovin' it.

This is his excited face.

I kept trying to get them to look at me so I could take a picture but they were way too busy to bothered with such trivial things when there was water and bubbles at their fingertips!

Oh Yuri...... Last week was a great week. He seemed to be happier and more calm. We seemed to be making progress and he spent a lot of time with the family. I rearranged the ENTIRE house to accommodated him. I think the new lay out might drive Asher and Roxie batty but it is working for him.

I felt really hopeful last week. I felt like we were moving forward but as many of you have told me it is like taking 2 steps forward and 1 back. Well... we got the lab results back from the endocrinologist on Friday with a prescription for a thyroid medicine. All the labs said was that his growth hormone and his thyroid was low. So I filled the script right away with much anticipation.

Then I read the product insert. Must be taken on an empty stomach 30 minutes to 1 hour before a meal and with a full glass of water. If you know Yuri you know that he doesn't DO liquids. No water, no juice! So I crushed up the pill and put it in a little bit of juice and couldn't get him to take it. So since I am quite proficient at NG tubes, after Caius, I put an NG tube in his nose and gave him the pill and the water straight into his tummy. Granted it took a lot to get the tube in but in the end it was better. I think it will get easier as time goes on.

On Saturday and Sunday, I gave him the chance to drink it on his own but he wouldn't have it. So I sat and squirted it into his mouth while he layed there and screamed. It took 30 minutes to give him the crushed pill and 3 oz. of water. If you didn't know what I was doing you would have thought I was torturing the child.

Not to mention the wonderful side effects of the stuff. He has lost his appetite. He is emitting a terrible odor. And his irritability is back. yay (insert sarcasm font here). I have been on the phone with the pharmacist, the endocrinologist's nurse and our pediatrician, trying to figure out what to do and it looks like we are out of luck. There is no other form of this medication and it has to be on an empty stomach with water. So now I feel like we are back to square 3. I won't say square 1 because he is much better than when we first got him home.

We might get a PT consult tomorrow and I'm going to the Pediatrician tomorrow to get a letter to give to our insurance as to why Yuri needs more the 20 therapies a year. Really? Anyway, I'm hoping to post some better news later this week.

Thank you all so much for your advice, encouragement, and support. I can't tell you what it means to me and does for me. Hugs to you all!

a dream and some pics

2011-05-20T21:22:00.000-07:00

Hey a girl can dream! Right?

Bohdan actually did go in the potty. Yay Bohdan!!

He is such an angel!

He is really getting the hang of this toy!

Yuri saw the TV for the first time EVER today. He noticed it at about 2 feet away and quickly got as close as he could.

Its so cute that the toy is bigger than he is. Interesting fact, this was originally mine and my brothers. My mom said we never played with it. Well that is all changing now. It is a fav with my boys.

I'm sorry Erica but this pic was too cute not to post. Asher girlfriend Clari came over to play one day and they went to play in my room. I didn't think anything of it. Asher often plays in there. And this is how we found them. Pretending to be asleep under the covers. :o)

So Asher is crying one day outside. I go out to see what is wrong and this was it. I'm not sure what he expected when he put both feet into the water bowl. hmm.....?

Look at this little precious big boy! Bohdan now lets us brush his teeth! Thank you JESUS!!

This that and the other

2011-05-16T12:29:00.001-07:00

We had a great weekend. Dede, papa woody and Alyssa came to visit. actually we went to their hotel and hung out at the pool. Caius and Bohdan are half fish and LOVED the water. Asher was ok until he drank some water then he just played outside the pool. Yuri didn't like the water too much but the metal pole leading into the hot tub was super interesting! It made noise and vibrated! Wow!

We have an answer to prayer. THE HOUSE SOLD! Thank you so much for your prayers. We feel like a huge weight has been lifted. thank you Jesus! It has been a long time since we payed just one mortgage!

prayer requests:

Please pray for the Hartman family. Remember lil Brady a Lost boy in the institution? Well they are there to adopt him right now. I know first hand how hard the trip can be and they are going to a very hard region. Please pray for them and for hearts to be changed.

http://www.happyhartmanfarm.blogspot.com/

Also please pray for us. I know you already do but we are faced with some really hard decisions concerning Yuri. Lately he has been more calm and happier which has been really nice but we still don't have any services or help for him. He is falling through ALL the cracks even the ones here at home. I'm spread so thin and I don't think he is getting what he needs. So we are exploring all of his options. Please pray for guidance and wisdom as we seek the Lords will on this.

I wrote this on Friday and between blogger being on the fritz and my computerYET again being a poopy pants I am just getting around to posting this.

Yuri's endocrinologist was yesterday. This is the appointment we have been so looking forward to. And even though we didn't learn anything we didn't already know he told us something that we have been waiting to hear. ...to see if we can help Yuri. Yeehaw!!!

I mean we still have to wait for the labs to come back but he gave us HOPE!!! which is more than we have gotten in the past. We are super excited.

Happy Birthday Asher!

2011-05-11T20:02:00.000-07:00

3 years old!!

This is a beautiful pic taken by Robin but I can't make it bigger. I put it on FB too it is larger there.

It was 3 years ago today that Josh and I became parents. Wow! This was just yesterday.

My sweet baby boy is growing up way too fast! How do we get them to stop growing?

Just normal stuff

2011-05-10T08:08:00.000-07:00

So I have been sick as a dog since Sunday morning. Even though I don't get that saying because I was laying there in misery and my dogs are bouncing off the walls in excitement about, as far as I can tell, nothing!

So last night I'm waiting for Josh to get home and take over my duties so I can crawl up in a corner and wallow in my misery. To pass the time I decide to take the kiddos outside for some Vit D. I put Bohdan in his jump and he is a happy camper. I put Caius in his jump and he is less than enthused. In fact he is down right mad about the prospect and he is letting me know. Asher is running around playing ball with Roxie our German Shepherd.

I'm bringing Yuri outside and as I get to the end of the porch I see Roxie with a dumb look on her face holding the ball in her mouth right there near the porch. Caius is still sharing his feelings when I notice that she is in the squatting position and Asher is laying down behind her trying to get the best view possible of her rear end. It is then that I trip off the porch and my jeans catch on this wire fencing that I have up to keep everyone off the place I'm trying to grow grass.

I try to catch myself but my jeans are hooked and I'm going down. I'm trying to be careful and not drop Yuri and not to scare him either. But on the other hand I'm trying not to fall on Roxie because then she will move mid-squat and cover Asher with the stuff he is so eagerly try to figure out.

I fall onto my elbows. Yuri is fine and un-alarmed. Roxie finishes and trots off. Bohdan is non the wiser. Caius is still sharing his feelings and Asher is saying "oh no! Yook!" over and over while pointing at the pile-o-pooh that Roxie so generously shared with us.

I put the fence back together and on Asher's insistence got the pooper scooper and cleaned up the mush that started this whole mess.

Never a dull moment.

Lessons learned today....

2011-05-06T19:48:00.001-07:00

#1 When taking a 3 year old boy through the metal detector at an airport always check his pockets for matchbox cars.

#2 Never underestimate how dirty a duck can get. That mallard got another bath today but I am not sure of the source of the water. I'm hoping it was the kiddie pool in the backyard.

#3 Never trust a rabbit. No matter how long he ignores your beautiful little growing plants that you painstakingly grew from seeds and babied for weeks. He will find them and then in one gulp destroy all your work. I think it is 'wabbit' season! BTW we have a pet rabbit who comes and goes as he pleases. I try to keep him in the backyard but he is wiley. He was a stray my neighbor found last Easter and now it is not uncommon to drive down our road and see a huge silky black bunny crossing the street. He is also housebroken and uses the doggie door, I just can't get him to stop chewing on cords. hmmmm....

#4 When you have 4 babies in diapers and the trash falls over, don't assume that what you see is an old piece of avocado. Don't assume that all fecal matter was contained in neatly wrapped balls of diapers. Oh no! Assume the worst and NEVER trust a pile of mush!

That's all for today. Cheers!

To bathe a duck

2011-05-05T10:12:00.000-07:00

So Yuri has a new friend and its name is Puron. Oh yes it is the AC. He crawls to it anytime he is outside. He pulls himself up, places his head on it to feel the vibration and just stands there in bliss.

Josh was reading Asher a book and I put Caius in the mix. Caius was way more interested in Dadda than he was the book. I love his face!

So I got this great deal on a train table with the whole train set at a second hand store, Thank you Tracy. :o) It has a loop in it and I couldn't believe Asher could fit inside! I wondered how the track kept coming apart.

This is Nick the 'Godfather' holding the twins.

So here is the story of the day. Asher pulls out the toy bin with the stuffed animals and brings me three to kiss, a duck, a beaver, and a monkey. I'm on the floor with the twins and don't

think too much about it when he goes into my bedroom. He often plays in there on my bed.

So I'm holding one of the babies and I catch a glimpse of Asher running from my room through the kitchen and into his room. I hear shuffling around in his closet and then he flies back through. I still am not alarmed. A few moments later he comes to me with a soaking wet duck and a burp cloth which he had procured from his closet. He motions for me to wrap it up. So I wrap up the duck and acknowledge (with as much exuberance as I can muster) that he gave the duck a bath.

After the duck is properly swaddled, he takes the mallard and tucks it under his arm for safe keeping. Reluctantly I ask "Did you give the duck a bath in the sink?" He replied with an over exaggerated head nod. " Did you give the duck a bath in the tub?" Again an over exaggerated nod of agreement. Right... ( I think). "Did you give the duck a bath in the toilet?" I get the same affirmative. Yikes!

So I go into the bathroom and follow the trails of water around the sink to the TOILET and this is what I see......

A puddle of water at the base of the toilet and the monkey and beaver waiting for their turn. Needless to say, bath time for the stuffed animals ended there.

Yuri & Septo-Optic Dysplasia

2011-05-02T16:30:00.000-07:00

This was written by my dear friend Lyndsay. Thank for doing the leg work!

Hi everyone! I am the Godmother.. Now that doesn’t quite have the same ring to it as The Godfather but hey, what are ya gonna do?

We have all been doing some online research trying to figure out what exactly this means. I want to share with you what we found.

Please feel free to let us know if you find anything interesting that we might have missed.

First off! It looks like this is THE diagnosis that we have been waiting for! YAY!!

Now we just have to figure out who the right doctors are that we need to see so that Yuri can get to feeling better.

For those of you who have not already Googled and found the definition of Septo-Optic Dysplasia here it is:

What is Septo-Optic Dysplasia?

Septo-optic dysplasia (SOD) is a rare disorder characterized by abnormal development of the optic disk, pituitary deficiencies, and often absence of the part of the brain that separates the anterior horns or the lateral ventricles of the brain. Symptoms may include blindness in one or both eyes, pupil dilation in response to light, rapid, involuntary to-and-fro movement of the eyes, inward and outward deviation of the eyes, low muscle tone, and hormonal problems. Seizures may also occur. In a few cases, prolonged yellow skin discoloration may occur at birth. Intellectual problems vary in severity among individuals. While some children with SOD have normal intelligence, others have learning disabilities and mental retardation. Most, however, are developmentally delayed due to vision impairmentor neurological problems.

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/septo_optic_dysplasia/septo_optic_dysplasia.htm

As you all know Autumn found out that Yuri is legally blind and everyone can see that he has rapid, involuntary to-and-fro movement of the eyes. He also seems to have some pretty seriousdevelopmental delays.

When Yuri was diagnosed NO ONE mentioned that learning disabilities and developmental delays are a part of Yuri’s diagnosis. Now after doing our own research we can see that there is reason for little Yuri’s behavior.

Yuri has two out of the three “signs” of septo-optic dysplasia.. The first major feature would be the severely underdeveloped optic nerves and the second major feature is the underdevelopment of thepituitary gland.

The pituitary is a gland at the base of the brain that produces several hormones. These hormones help control growth, reproduction, and other critical body functions. Underdevelopment of the pituitary can lead to a shortage of many essential hormones. Most commonly, pituitary hypoplasia causes growth hormone deficiency, which results in slow growth and unusually short stature. Severe cases causepanhypopituitarism, a condition in which the pituitary produces no hormones. Panhypopituitarism is associated with slow growth, low blood sugar, genital abnormalities, and problems with sexual development.

The signs and symptoms of septo-optic dysplasia can vary significantly. Some researchers suggest that septo-optic dysplasia should actually be considered a group of related conditions rather than a single disorder. About one-third of people diagnosed with septo-optic dysplasia have all three major features; most affected individuals have two of the major features. In rare cases, septo-optic dysplasia is associated with additional signs and symptoms, including recurrent seizures, delayed development, and abnormal movements.

http://ghr.nlm.nih.gov/condition/septo-optic-dysplasia

Typically people with Septo Optic Dysplasia have abnormalities of the brain. These abnormalities may include how the brain is formed and or how the brain works. While both usually occur, sometimes a child has a problem only with the structure of the brain and at other times, a child has a problem only with the function of the brain. All problems with the brain can range from mild to very serious. When a child is diagnosed with Septo-Optic Dysplasia he or she will undergo a number of evaluations and brain function tests. A Neurologist can look at the brain structure through the use of CT scan or MRI. After these tests are performed your doctor should be able to tell if there are major problems with the brain structure.

Yuri has a perfectly normal brain structure. The problem is in the brain function which can be much more difficult to evaluate.

Now we need to find out what all is affecting Yuri and how we can help him. The pituitary gland pretty much controls all the glands in the body and all the hormones that those glands create. This can affect growth which explains Yuri’s small stature, metabolism and sexual development. Some children who lack growth hormone also have low blood sugar which we still need to test Yuri for. We already know that he cannot tolerate dairy, soy or wheat. Adrenal glands which are also controlled by the pituitary make small amounts of cortisol at various times during the day. Cortisol is necessary to help the body create energy, control the blood sugar and allow for proper heart and lung function. Also, with a poorly functioning pituitary gland, the thyroid gland does not get the proper signal to make thyroid hormone when it is needed. Thyroid hormone helps in normal growth and helps make energy for the body to function. Lack of thyroid hormone can lead to poor growth, slowing of mental and muscle function, weight gain, feeling cold, hair loss, hoarse voice, brittle nails, and dry coarse skin. The pituitary gland also produces a hormone called Anti-diuretic Hormone that is responsible for keeping water in the body by controlling the amount of urine that is created. If you know Yuri you know that boy always had a dirty diaper… Without enough ADH a person cannot control the amount of urine and he could become dehydrated. The person lacking ADH feels thirsty, has a dry mouth and yet continues to make large amounts of urine. There is treatment for all of these potential problems. Yuri has a doctor appointment next month with the Endocrinologist who will hopefully be able to grasp what is going on with Yuri and what his body needs to function. Yuri never seems to be able to stop moving and just relax. We are praying that the Endocrinologist can help with the right medications.

http://www.magicfoundation.org/www/docs/101.115/optic-nerve-hypoplasia-septo-optic-dysplasia

Below I have listed the symptoms that Yuri displays that until now we did not know the cause:

GI issues - throwing up, sensitive tummy – Underdeveloped Pituitary Gland which can create problems with metabolizing food

Small head and stature – Lack of thyroid hormone can lead to poor growth

Awkward/jerky movements – In rare cases abnormal movements can be associated with Septo-Optic Dysplasia

Mental delay - Intellectual problems vary in severity among individuals

Everyone please pray that the Endocrinologist has the knowledge to help Yuri progress to the best of his abilities.

pics and some news

2011-04-29T10:20:00.000-07:00

Bohdan after swimming, cuddled in a blanket. The boy is such a cuddler!

Working with his OT, Kimi. He was sitting up like such a big boy and was having a blast!

Caius playing by the pool.

Asher Easter egg hunting.

So I have been trying and trying, calling and working on getting Yuri services, therapies, anything. The child needs help. So today we met with a social worker and a nurse to try and enlist the three SN kiddos in a Medicaid waiver program. What would this mean? It means that we could actually get therapies for Yuri. I could get respite. Bohdan could get therapies after his birthday.

To qualify you have to show a medical need to receive this help. Caius might qualify since he has a G-tube but it is unlikely the other two will. Can I just say.... GRRRRRRR!!!!

I'm so irritated. All I want is for Yuri to get help but it is seeming impossible. We have good insurance but no home health companies will take us because we don't have a Medicaid backup.

I have kinda been putting all my hopes in this basket. I have been told by more than one professional that Yuri should qualify but now it is not looking so good. Please pray that he qualifies.

I'm meeting with a woman this afternoon to continue trying to get him into the school system where he can get some therapies even though it won't be as intensive as he needs.

just some pics

2011-04-21T07:12:00.000-07:00

So I walked into Asher's room and found this. A chalk outline of his Teddy Bear 'Harley'. Apparently Harley was covered with baby powder and then fled the scene.

Caius being a big boy and sitting up for Ms Kimi, his OT.

Grandma Di and the twins. I love this pic.

Look at his hair blowing in the breeze. Its getting long and soft.

I thought this pic looked sweet. Too bad its not. Notice Bohdan is not happy because Yuri is banging his head on his back.

Caius sitting up so straight He has started pulling on his clothes and looking in them like "What going on in there?"

These are pics of me and my girlfriend being ridiculous.

The winter took quite a toll on our plants and we had to cut back our palm and now it looks like a huge pineapple in the middle of our front yard. And what else are you supposed to do with that but take pics. :o)

still tweaking the blog

2011-04-19T14:53:00.000-07:00

I'm still working on the blog but this is it for now. This is now the adoption and the family blog all rolled into one. It will keep the noknots.blogspot.com address cuz its easy. I've been trying to get a pic with all four of them and this is the best I have gotten. I figure it is pretty true to real life.

My girlfriend is working on a post that will walk you through Yuri's diagnosis but I can tell you that it is Septo-Optic Dysplasia and nothing more. Which is comforting knowing we aren't still looking. Thank you for all of you who left me a comment with links to more information on this. You were right SOD does account for all of his issues. I guess since it is so rare the doctors didn't know all about it. I am generally the person that will research things and not just take a doctors word on it but I've been a little busy. :o)

I took Bohdan and Yuri to the Dentist today which went surprisingly better than I had expected. Bohdan's teeth are great! He is cutting 5 teeth right now though, 2 of which are molars, YUCK! Yuri's teeth are fine but we are having to watch his front two to make sure they don't go bad, they are on the cusp. He is cutting 4 molars! Poor little dudes! I was happy to hear that overall their teeth are in good shape. Thank you Jesus!

Storming Heaven for Vanya

2011-04-16T22:20:00.000-07:00

This is a post from Adeye's blog. You can read it here.

April 15, 2011

SO URGENT!!!!!!

Dearest friends,

Oh my goodness....my heart is aching.

I come to you today begging for your help. Yes, I'm begging.

We desperately need a family for Vanya as soon as possible. Many people have inquired about adopting him. But things have changed and we URGENTLY need a family who is paperwork ready--one who has already done their home study and has USCIS approval. We need a family who can get to him quickly.

While I am not at liberty to give any details, I can tell you that Vanya's situation has turned into a critical need for prayer. He needs a paperwork-ready family to commit to him in the next few days...before it is too late.

Time is running out.

Do you know of a family who is already adopting a child from Ukr*ine? Do you know of someone who is traveling to adopt a child from there soon and may consider adding this precious boy to their adoption? Either a family who is already adopting, or a family who has all their paperwork ready and has been waiting on the Lord to show them the right child.

Friends, we urgently need your help....PLEASE spread Vanya's story on blogs, social networks, and adoption discussion groups. We absolutely have to find his family soon. The finances are not an issue--God has provided them. Now all we need is the right family--one who will say, "Here am I, Lord, send me!"

With all my heart I believe that Vanya's family is out there. Why? Because I believe that God has provided in a miraculous way for this boy to come home. I believe in miracles in 2011! I do.

Please stand with us in prayer over the next few days...trusting that Vanya's family will come forward. How desperately he needs them now.

Pray, body of Christ! Pray without ceasing. Pray until Vanya is rescued and safely in the arms of those who love him.

Thank you for helping us today. Thank you for praying and bringing this boy before the Father. Thank you for trusting with us. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it.

"If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” Matt 17:20.

"MOUNTAIN BE MOVED!"

Any family who thinks they may be able to get to Vanya quickly, and would like more information, please contact Chris Malone at the Eli Project as soon as possible.

You can read Vanya's full story right here.

Child labor

2011-04-16T07:38:00.001-07:00

No children were actually made to work.

Yuri fixin' the car.

Bohdan overseeing Asher's hair cut. He had to make sure I was doing it correctly.

Asher digging up this plant.

Washing the car.

Doing the dishes.

I've decided to merge our family blog and our adoption blog since they are one in the same and I don't have time to keep up two blogs, technically I don't have time to keep up one blog. Which brings me to my next point.

Many of you said that you missed the "Truth" post and didn't know how. Well this is what happened. I started that post the same day as the "prayer request" post, actually before. It took me almost a week to write it. When I finally finished and posted it it posted back to the day I had started it. That gives you an idea how long it takes me to write a post! LOL.

Prayer Request

2011-04-05T10:35:00.000-07:00

Remember way back when I asked for prayer so we could sell our house in New Mexico? Well the Lord has answered that prayer and we are under contract with a buyer. It is actually our 3rd contract because things keep falling through.

Anyway we are set to close on the 15th of April but the underwriters aren't liking the appraisal. more specifically the adjustments that the appraiser made. This is the only thing that is standing in the way of selling the house. Please pray! It would be such a huge blessing to only make one house payment! Thanks!

Truth

2011-04-05T08:21:00.000-07:00

We are fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalms tells us that while we were still in our mothers womb that God knew us. He made us just the way that He intended and He doesn't make mistakes.

Getting the news that your child has a special need is not something that any parent wants to hear. We want the BEST for our child and as humans in this society the BEST is normalcy. To have every opportunity and to succeed in the world that we know. Problem is that we are limited by our understanding. Reading the book 'Radical' by David Platt helped me to accept Caius' diagnosis. He said that we are created for one purpose and that is for God's glory. So I have to trust and believe that God has so much more in store for Caius and all my children with SN than could have been accomplished without their SN.

I still struggle though. Every once in a while the diagnosis of Down's Syndrome will jump up and bite me and I will feel sad for Caius. And this is coming from a Mom who adopted special needs kiddos. But that is just my pride, insecurity and humaness. I know God called us to Bohdan and Yuri specifically but I still wonder, Why? I'm ashamed to admit that I have often wondered what God could have possibly been thinking with Yuri? Surely he is better suited for a children's home instead of a family. Surely everyone would be better off that way.

But then I'm reminded that God doesn't make mistakes and that He placed these two babies in our home for a reason. I don't know what that reason is but He did and with His help we will succeed.

So to answer some of your question from the comments this is my response. Adopting these two babies has been one of the hardest things I have ever done. I mean it is right up there with Caius' open heart surgeries. And I thank you all for your comments even the hard ones.

In particular, one of the comments asked, would he be better suited for institutional life? I'm glad this was asked to me because it made me answer. It made me cross over to the other side of the question and here is my answer. NO.

He seeks out attention. He wants love. Granted he doesn't know how to process it. He claps and laughs when I get him out of his crib. He crawls to me and holds onto my leg to stand. He does this while I get ready and watches me put on my makeup. He signs 'more', 'daddy' and 'please'. He craves praise! He mimics our sounds, kisses, raspberries, 'mama, ect. He shakes his head whenever he sees me, even if I'm just passing by, in hopes I'll return the shake.

-Is he tough and hard to deal with? yes.

-Is he learning? yes

-Is he making progress? yes

-Is he getting better? yes

-Does he know me? Yes

-Does he know I am his Momma? Yes

-Does he still have manic episodes? yes

-Are his manic episodes lessening? yes

-Is he ever going to be normal? I don't know

-Will he ever be independent? I don't know

-Did God call us to him and Bohdan specifically? Yes

-Knowing this would I change anything? No

- Do I believe God has a plan for Yuri? Yes

-Do I believe that God is going to use Yuri for His Glory? ABSOLUTELY

So yes, I'm a poopy pants and when days with Yuri are bad they are REALLY bad and I share them with you all probably more than I should and definitely more than I share the good days. But when days with Yuri are good they are amazing!

So from a momma who has had a rougher happily ever after with adoption than you would read in fairy tales let me say this: If God is calling you to adopt, if He is nudging your heart, Go!!!! Follow!! Obey!! you will be so much better for it. These children deserve a family! Even the hard ones. They have had a rough start so yeah love is a foreign thing to them but you can teach them what it is. You can show them. It is worth it! All of it!

I feed on all of your prayers support and advice and I thank you. Thank you for riding this roller coaster of a journey with me.

This is Trixie, Yuri's new buddy. They have been playing together and this is how I found them this morning.

And a little off topic

- I think we have a diagnosis for Yuri but I will save it for another post.

- the balls we took to Ukraine we found at Wal-Ma*t but don't tell anyone I went there. I just went there with my mom while I was out of town (Ern :o))

update

2011-04-03T15:37:00.000-07:00

Last Thursday we took Yuri to the Opthamologist and he confirmed what the Geneticist said about Septo-Optic Dysplasia. So Yuri now has a diagnosis of Septo-optic Dysplasia and he is legally blind. This is all good news because he has a diagnosis which helps get him services and we can get help from the blind community.

We have appointments with a dentist, an ENT, and an endocrinologist to see if we can figure out what else is going with our little guy.

I took him off dairy completely and he has still been throwing up here and there. I have now taken him off of wheat also so we shall see how this goes. He seems happier off of both.

Super awesometastic news is that he has gained 4 pounds!!! FOUR! How cool is that!

Any way here is some pics for ya.

This lil boy was born a Texan. He loves being outside and playing in water!

Swimming in our huge pool outback.

I think we are going to have to upgrade.

'I'm sitting up and I have a cord! YES!"

Mr. Handsome making noise, er I mean music.

The twins having a blast.

dwindling drum roll

2011-03-30T07:26:00.000-07:00

I wish I was asking for a drum roll to deliver great news about Yuri but I'm not. If you were doing an anticipatory drum roll you can stop. I'm sorry my spirits are low today. I am trusting God that He is going to work all this out for His glory.

We had the much anticipated Geneticist follow up appointment yesterday to go over all of Yuri's labs and MRI. We were so hoping for answers. Everything came back normal except that his pituitary gland is underdeveloped and so are his optic nerves. He has all but one of the symptoms of Septo-optic dysplaysia. However SOD wouldn't account for all of his symptoms and most importantly his mental delay.

So now we see more specialist. Because of the anomalies of his eyes he does have poor vision we just don't now how poor. We are going to the Ophthalmologist tomorrow a fact I excitedly told the Doc but he said there is nothing that can help this type of vision loss.

We also ran two more labs, one is an expensive long shot and the other won't tell us anything really. Josh and I are just grasping at anything for answers, for a little peace.

Yuri was his normal self for the entire visit yesterday and he had everyone's attention because he was so loud and unhappy. When we were trying to talk to the doctor we could barely hear him over Yuri's noise. The nurse made a comment about it and Josh said this is normal from, 7:30am to about 11:30pm he is constant motion and noise, if he isn't making the noise himself he is making someone or something else make the noise. I was almost in tears at the 'no' news and the nurse understood.

It felt so good to have someone really understand how hard Yuri is. She walked us down to the lab and she told me that she has been doing 'this' a long time and something has to be going on with Yuri that can be fixed or helped.

Yuri bangs his head on this in order to push the button to make it light up and play music.

This was the first toy he ever played with and didn't immediately throw.

He is cute!

This was before he took all the letters off the fridge.

Remember how hard the orphanage visits were for us. How exhausting? We thought it was because the boys didn't see us as their primary care givers and we were still in the orphanage. I now realize it was just Yuri. I would never try to just sit and play with Yuri for 2 hours right now, it would be miserable for both of us. But yet that is what we were doing everyday sometimes twice a day. Anyway that was just a revelation for me. I'm off to make more phone calls.

My precious Bohdan

2011-03-28T08:30:00.001-07:00

From what I know, Bohdan was diagnosed at birth with Trisomy 21 and was left at the hospital. He was transfered at birth to the orphanage where he survived in a crib for the next 3 years of his life only doubling his weight. What does this mean? It means that he was never held. He was never cuddled or had the chance to look up into a loving face and feel secure in someones arms. It means that to him physical contact was a negative thing and very rough. It means that he has always comforted himself. It means that he has never fallen asleep in someone arms. He has always fallen asleep alone.

But guess what! We serve an awesome and mighty God who had different plans for this precious angel, tiny and forgotten yet so full of love and life if given the chance.

We were in church with our twins, Caius and Bohdan (everyone thinks they are twins because they are the same size even though they are separated by a year and ten months) yesterday. Nick and Lyndsay were holding them. Bohdan started crying which is very uncharacteristic. Lyndsay gave him to me and I tried everything but he was just not happy. So we just snuggled. He finally calmed down and lay there trying not to go sleep. He would open his sleepy blue eyes and look up into my eyes and then slowly close them again. He fought going to sleep but finally he drifted off. Every once in a while he would open his eyes to look at me. I figure he was checking to make sure I was still there. Then he relaxed and went into a deep sleep. His body went limp and he started breathing slowly and his little blue eyes were opened just enough where I could see they were crossed. He was deep asleep in his Momma's loving arms and he was content and I was in heaven.

thoughts...

2011-03-23T13:07:00.000-07:00

I can throw an amazing party! Huge party! Granted they aren't much fun and I'm the only participant but I throw one great pity party! I mean REALLY! I have four children under four if your talking about age. Developmentally I have 3 under 1 and 1 under 3. My husband works long hours and we don't have any family in town. We are trying to sell the home we moved out of and it is taking years. Plus we are so close to closing and then we find a skunk living under the house and it was broken into but we are too far away to help. Our youngest son has had two open heart surgeries in the last year and has been hospitalized numerous times with congestive heart failure. Not to mention the two children we just adopted are severely underweight and developmentally delayed and one of them is out of control. He is older and we are having a hard time getting him help and he is having a hard time adjusting and...... you get the picture?

You know what? IT DOESN'T MATTER!! IT IS A CAKE WALK!

Ok before you think I've totally lost it....... I finally got a bit of time to jump on Facebo0k and WHAM! My little puny reality just faded into the distance. Its enough right? If we help those adopting. If we support those adopting? If we give of our time and our money? It is definitely enough if we actually adopt a child especially a special needs child. Throw on an extra and that is double points of enough. If thats not enough, then the fact that one is tremendously hard to deal with and I have no time to even connect with the outside world. That's enough right? Just cross that out on the 'TO DO' list and move on.

Oh that is so pathetic and so wrong.

I thought Bohdan was tiny but there is baby that was just brought home. Her name is Carrington and she is 3 years old and weighs 11 pounds. She is in the hospital fighting for her life. She is so malnourished her body is shutting down. Click her name for her story.

Then there is Kirill. Handsome Kirill. I have often looked at his picture on Reece's Rainbow. He has a Mommy and Daddy who love him. Who have held him, and kissed him and hugged him and yet the judge said 'NO.' NO?............ They are appealing the judge's ruling. There is also another family coming before this same judge soon. click on his name for more of his story.

Then there is Landon. Landon has gone to live with Jesus. Just like Nikita. Click here to see those who have gone to Jesus never knowing love this side of heaven.

After we had visited our boys a few times and were told that court was going to be delayed I sent out a plea for prayer. I was so scared of what might happen to them during that time. They were so sick and frail. I read a blog today and it put it into perspective. We always talk about how these orphans are living on borrowed time well that is not true, not by a long shot! They are surviving on borrowed time. My little Bohdan was just surviving and now he is living! He is cruising the house and getting loved on and played with. Before, my little angel just layed in a room, in a crib by himself for years just hanging on. FOR YEARS!!!

We need to storm heaven. This battle is not of flesh and blood. There are actual souls, BABIES, just surviving, waiting, wanting to live and to love. Even Yuri who I thought didn't care, he cares. He is trying so hard to be a part of this family and connect. He is seeking out interaction and is even trying to say, 'mama'.

So what am I saying? Thank you all for your prayers and support. Thank you Lord for my four boys. Thank you that Yuri and Bohdan are on the road to recovery. Thank you Lord for modern medicine and that Caius' and Bohdan's hearts were fixed. Thank you Lord for saving these two precious angels. Thank you Lord for slapping some sense into me that this is not over there is still so much to do.

So my life is cake and all my fuel for my pity parties are gone. I'm not saying that can't come back but wallowing in my self misery just won't work any longer and I, we, have to keep on going, keep on spreading the word about these orphans. Keep storming heaven for these families. And keep these precious forgotten children in the front of our minds because compared to their existence our lives, even when they are rough, are nothing compared to their lonely lives of surviving day to day.

ok and yes yes pics are coming soon. :0)

MRI and the aftermath

2011-03-18T07:50:00.000-07:00

My girlfriend Tracy and her son Aidan left yesterday while Yuri and I were at the hospital. Bohdan just fell in love with Aidan, Aidan held him all the time and Bohdan loved every minute.

We arrived at the hospital on time at 10:45am. The MRI was scheduled for 12:15pm. Yuri hadn't had anything to eat since the night before and then only pedialite at 10:05am so he was on the verge of a breakdown. The nurse took us back around 11:30am to get ready for the anesthesiologist. He was EVERYWHERE!! They kept asking "is this normal for him?" "Does he always move this much?" YUP!!! They kept asking all these questions about his history and most of the answers were "I dunno." I wasn't much help. I did tell them however that the sedative I tried to use on the plane just barely worked. They asked if he had sleep apnea. I said yes. They asked "diagnosed?" I said "Mommy diagnosed." "But not really?" I told them that I am 99% sure he has sleep apnea (no idea how to spell this).

So the anesthesiologist told me that she will give him the IV sedative, if he is still moving or has sleep apnea then she will have to give him a general and use a tube to breath for him. She said we would stay 2 hours after if just regular but if they have to do a general then we will have to stay 4 hours!!

I told her that he does have sleep apnea and that I figure they will need to do the general. (but I'm just momma, I don't know what I talking about.) So they give him the first sedative........ nothing, they give him another dose and he stops moving as much so they wheel him away saying that it will only take 35-45 minutes. An hour and a half later they call and say that he was moving on the table and they couldn't get a good picture between that and him snoring and him stopping breathing!! So they had to give him a general and redo some of the MRI.

So when I finally get back to see him the nurse tells me "Wow! he is hard to put under. Next time he needs something like this just tell them to do the general because the sedation doesn't work on him. You also need to get a sleep study done because he probably has sleep apnea."

.....

What do you say to that? I should have said "Here's your sign." "I know you aren't going to understand this but that muffler is gonna be hot!" (another quote, I can't help it)

Anywho we didn't leave until 7pm. I was not expecting to stay ALL day long. Well I wish that would have been the end of it but it wasn't. Since we had company we moved Yuri into our closet to sleep and needless to say we have not been sleeping well at all because he makes SO much noise and talks and yells in his sleep. I was so looking forward to moving him back into his room so Josh and I could sleep. Well.... 3am he is up screaming! I tried everything and I still don't know what was going on. He screamed for over an hour and woke everyone up. So all the babies are up and sleep deprived Josh and I are befuddled. He finally quit and everyone went back to sleep. Josh and I took a bit longer because we were wide awake!

Then the morning comes and he wakes up screaming. He has been screaming for 2 hours straight now and I am at a loss. Anyway the price of this MRI was WAY more than we all expected. But today is Friday, Thank Goodness!!!

Ok, so remember Sonya. Sweet Sonya! She has a family! It is bitter sweet though. Sonya's family were adopting Dusty and Nikita but precious Nikita went to live with Jesus. Even though he is in a much better place it is still hard. Anyway they have decided to bring home Sonya with Dusty. Here is their blog, http://godsarrowsinourquiver.blogspot.com/. They should be traveling soon.

Ok remember, Julia from Yuri and Bohdan's room? Her family met her yesterday for the first time! To see pictures visit thier blog at http://schwenzerfamilyupdates.blogspot.com/

Blessings to you all and thank you so much for your prayers!! I must go find my house now. I know it is here somewhere in all this mess.

Big Amazing This and That......

2011-03-16T11:47:00.000-07:00

Playing in water.

Aunt Robin getting some loving from her nephews.

Grandma Di wrestling with her boys.

Caius sitting up.

The water is so funny!

Asher eating the flower he had picked for me.

Caius is pushing to sit!!!! and then he sits and sits and sits all by himself! I'm so proud! He is also eating a whole thing of baby food! Yippee! Plus he has gained over a pound last month. Chunker!

Bohdan has gained two pounds since he has been home! He is also mister 'about town'. He has finally ventured off the living room rug and goes all around the house. He will army crawl to the front door when it is open. Funny thing is though that he gets stuck on the mat because he doesn't like the way it feels on his skin.

Yuri hasn't gained any weight I don't think but he is doing better over all. His manic episodes aren't as frequent but they are still around. He is seeking out attention. He still doesn't like to be held but he does like to hold your hand. He is also signing 'more'! I'm super proud!! He has an MRI scheduled for today. I was going to add that he hasn't thrown up in over a week but then yesterday we were on our way to a drive through safari with our friends from NM and while we were waiting in line to get in, He threw up all over the car. :o( Needless to say we didn't get to go to the safari. Instead we went home and my friend cleaned the car. Happy spring break! Thank the Lord for fabulous friends who give up their spring break to clean puke!

Asher is awesome and wrestles with the boys. This is a good thing with Yuri because Yuri overall likes it however with the little guys it doesn't go over so well. We keep having to tell him 'gentle!' What a 2.5 year old! This is a great age.

Anyway, gotta run. My harddrive crashed and I just got my computer back. Still trying to load all my programs and such. Can I just say YUCK!!!

traveling

2011-03-08T08:24:00.001-08:00

for those traveling soon..... check out my traveling page, it is under construction but hope it helps.

Happy Sunday!

2011-03-06T06:42:00.000-08:00

So we randomly got an appointment with a geneticist on Friday. It was such a God thing, He is so cool. We were having a very hard time getting an appointment with genetisist M then Thursday a nurse from geneticist S called and wanted to schedule us for Friday. I didn't argue or ask about the mix up and made the appointment.

The genetticist said he doesn't think it is a metabolic disorder but he had a lot of ideas and was a plethora of information. He is testing his chromosomes, his urine and he drew some blood. I'm so excited to get some answers. Yippee!

In keeping with our tradition, someone, I'm not going to name any names :o), pulled my computer off onto the floor and now it is in the shop. I hope to get it back soon. I thought the cord was under the couch but my boys are really wiley.

Last week was a rollercoaster, started good and by wednesday I was calling for help. So Thursday, my friend Brenda came over and helped me with my ironing, bless her. Poor Josh was getting to end of his closet and pulling out clothes I hadn't seen in a while. :o/ Then Friday, my friend Barbara came over for a bit to see the boys and help me around the house. She has a lot of experience with SN and even taught Yuri to sign 'more'. I'm really proud of him.

Josh's parents came this weekend and we had a blast. I really enjoyed our time together and I wish they lived closer. The boys really enjoyed the constant attention. Bohdan absolutley loved Grumpy (thats grandpa) and would speed crawl to him whenever he had the chance.

Well we are going to try church again. Oh my! We shall see how it goes. Just wanted to give you all a quick update. Hopefully I can get you pictures soon. Happy Sunday!

Ok, Ok, I'm sorry

2011-02-28T09:44:00.000-08:00

My gorgeous Caius James

Asher Max laying with his teddy bear in the back yard

Yuri playing on his fire truck.

Bohdan, the resident ham.

Yuri blowing kisses.

Aren't they cute!

My little Bohdan, who if you ask him was made to be held ALL the time!

Yuri crawling on Bohdan. Bohdan didn't seem to mind THIS time.

This is when his chin was so chapped.

Thank you all for being so patient. I'm sorry I haven't posted but things are a bit crazy. Everyone is finally feeling better. Thank you Jesus!

Josh and I think Yuri is allergic to Dairy and Soy. If we keep those out of his bottles he doesn't throw up. Yippee!! Which means we have gone a few days with no projectile vomiting! Now if I just keep him from stealing Bohdan's bottle.

Yuri is doing a lot better. He is learning what he is allowed to do and not do. He isn't hitting the others anymore even though he loves to lay on Bohdan, lol. He is learning and that is exciting. He is very mobile and slides on his back all over the house. Him and I have bonded more and he actually wraps his arms around me and hangs on. I can't tell you how good that feels, I almost cried today cuz he was holding on so tight and giggling. He still has manic episodes but they are getting fewer and fewer. We aren't out of the woods by any means but I actually feel as though we are going forward instead of backwards.

Bohdan is gaining a little weight, I can see it in his face. We are working with him on sitting up and he is very VERY curious. He crawls right up into anyone's business to see what is going on. He is too cute! Right now he thinks he can't get off the rug onto the hard floor so his curiosity is contained, for now.

Ok that was yesterday, last night Yuri threw up, he just head butted Bohdan in the face and today he is a different child. He acts as though he hasn't bonded to me at all. He is super fussy and destructive today. I just don't know.

http://www.only1mom.com/2011/02/respite-careand-blogging.html

This is a great post about life after adoption. You know what they say is true, we project personalities onto the pictures we see on adoption websites. We dream for months about how a child will be and will act, when in all actuality we know NOTHING about the child. I knew this but I thought at the least the diagnosis would be close. Oh silly silly me. I think that might be one of the more frustrating things. Not being able to get answers about Yuri's issues. I wish I knew how to deal with him. I wish I understood what he was going through so I could help but I am just as lost as he is.

When I go out with all four by myself people stare (of course) and comment on my beautiful boys and then some will say to me how wonderful and patient I am. I just laugh.

Ok to set the record straight: I am not wonderful, I am struggling with patience, I love my children but am finding it hard to like them all (ok Yuri) all the time. I don't like this person I have become. I don't like feeling helpless and hopeless. I don't like feeling like I'm not a good mom to all of my children. I hate this depressed and frustrated me. My poor hubby inevitably gets the brunt of this deal. I am so short with him. Poor guy.

I am praying, I am trying, I have reached out for help but all the help takes time, all the doctors take time. Please pray we can get into the right doctor that can help Yuri and fast!

BTW, we had the ridiculous idea to try to go to church this Sunday. We are obviously gluttons for punishment. It could have been much worse but I was very happy when it was over. I do miss going to church. :o(

Update again

2011-02-22T16:04:00.000-08:00

Asher ran a fever ALL weekend, so we took him back to the doctor and come to find out he has ear infections that are flaming and pussy. :o( poor lil guy. His rash was gone on Friday but it left in waves down his body. So his forehead would be clear and then a few hours later his cheeks would be clear and so on. So now we don't think it was the measles but an allergic reaction to the penicillin. Anywho, we are on a different anitbiotic and I got him into our chiropractor today. So hopefully we are on the down hill path to wellness.

Bohdan is still happy as a clam and unscathed through all the sickness.

Caius still has a virus. He has a cough and runny nose. He is also throwing up quite a bit which I think is due to the drainage.

And then Yuri.... His nose isn't runny as much and he is responding well to my voice. For example, He will crawl up to one of his brothers and raise his hand to hit and I can tell him, "Yuri, no hitting. Be gentle" and he will put down is hand and look at me. So I do believe he is learning. He is throwing up a few times a day and each time it is about 3 to 4 projectile spews. I hope this passes soon.

As for the neurological appointment, the diagnosis of a metabolic disorder is much worse than the CP or Hydrocephalus. We are starting at square one and have no idea what kind it is, what parts of his body are being affected, his life expectancy or his prognosis. We are having to go to a super specialized geneticist to try and answer all these questions. If anyone has any advice concerning metabolic disorders I would appreciated it. :o)

I will try to get you all some pictures soon.

Neurology Appointment

2011-02-17T09:15:00.000-08:00

Yuri's test didn't show any seizures. Based on the information I gave him and his exam, the doctor said that Yuri does not have CP and probably doesn't have hydrocephalus due to his small head size. He also doubts that Yuri suffered any major brain damage at birth. (I'm so glad I requested (fought) for the medicals to be translated.) He ordered an MRI and told us to go see a geneticist.

He believes that Yuri has a metabolic disorder of some kind. So now we have to figure out what it is. We will see if the MRI comes back with anything interesting

one word....

2011-02-15T18:29:00.000-08:00

Measles.

Asher has the measles. yuck.

This was before the outbreak. Playing in the backyard.

Yuri was figuring out this thing called 'Grass'.

Bohdan posing. I had the boys outside soaking up the Vit D.

His chapped chin has almost healed up. almost. Not completley because he hasn't stopped chewing his fingers.

Caius posing with his cups. Poor kid is all chapped up from the snot and the weather.

Yuri with dinner around his mouth. Yes that is chocolate.

Jumping outside in his PJs.

Ok for the cardiologist update.

Both boys are fine! Praise the Lord.

We actually got an EKG and an echo-cardiogram on both boys. Wow!! Everyone did great!!

Dr. Glasow said he couldn't find the repair on Bohdan and that the surgery looked great. He said that there is a small murmur but nothing abnormal. He said Yuri's heart was perfect!

Big sigh of relief!! Thank you for your prayers. Neurologist appointment for Yuri is this Thursday. I will let you know how it goes.

Too funny not to share

2011-02-11T17:55:00.000-08:00

I'm gonna type this real fast before I forget.

Okay the dead bird was a trophy of our youngest cat Trixie. I don't know if she killed it or stole it but she was super proud. Cool thing about Trixie is that we got her from the animal shelter at the end of 2010. She was put into a tiny cage at age 6 weeks and wasn't taken out until we adopted her at 6 months. She has some funny and sad behaviors due to this. Needless to say she chooses to sleep in the boy's room. Its like she knows they share a common beginning. :o)

Ok the quote was from "City Slickers". Billy Crystal's character is helping birth a calf and he pulls out his hand covered in goop out of the cow and it flings goop as he points and says, 'this was not in the brochure." I thought it was fitting for yesterday.

Sometime in the chaos of yesterday a fed ex package arrived. I forgot about it until around lunch today. I opened it and it was from BoA our mortgage company. It was a full packet with information, forms and a prepaid fedex envelope for returning the paperwork. I read through it and it was to keep us from foreclosing on our house. "Huh?" I think and I throw it in the fireplace.

During naps I got a little time to go through and balance our budgets. I noticed that BoA had increased our payment amount due to escrow needing more money. I think I remember something about this before I left for U but haven't thought about it since. I wasn't too worried because we pay a little extra every month anyway. How much could it increase? I check it out and it increased by $50!! Oi! So I remember seeing an envelope from them in the mail yesterday and I grab it. It says we owe $790 bucks, the mortgage payment was only $605 before all this. So I call them. The number is a debt collection agency. What?

So I get online, find a good number and call it. After a lot of talking and checking and holding we figure out that our account is a full payment behind. So some more checking and investigating. Come to find out who ever posted our payment for December didn't post the payment insead posted it to principal so we have been behind since then. Grrrr!!! No wonder they were trying to offer us help on our mortgage. So we got that cleared up but I still have to fight to have it taken off my credit bureau.

How funny is that? We have a great day and then this.

So I was changing Yuri's dirty diaper today and swaddle the top of him and play him music. He is doing ok. Not great but better. Just then here comes Bohdan, he wants the phone playing music. He smashes Yuri in the face trying to crawl over him, this upsets Yuri. I move Bohdan, here he comes again and tries to crawl over Yuri's tummy. I'm thinking, 'Dear sweet child! Yuri is finally doing better and you have to get involved!" so I move him as far away as I possibly can while managing not to spread Yuri's mess. I continue. By the way, I diaper change on the floor in the living room. So Bohdan is MAD at this point and is throwing whatever he can reach. He is crawling and throwing. Out of the corner of my eye I see what he is dead set on getting to and throwing. The dirty diaper that has not been bound up yet. I can't let go of Yuri's legs or it will be a huge mess and I can't let Bohdan reach that diaper. Just then Asher attacks me from behind. He throws his arms around my neck and jumps on in pure WWF style. (we wrestle a lot) I wanted to scream "GO GO Gadget arms" but I new in the back of my mind nothing would happen. So I employed my leg to roll Bohdan away, I shook my torso to free myself of the 2 year old and never let go of Yuri who at this point was happy listening to his music. Caius looking on in amazement. Oh the joys of motherhood!

Btw, no throw ups today. And yesterday Yuri only threw up once the rest was Caius. :o(

At the next Yuri dirty diaper change I didn't touch his legs. Instead I touched his shoes and placed his feet where it allowed me to wipe well. He didn't even squirm until I had to raise a leg to get everything clean. Things that make you go hmmmmm..........

Quick update

2011-02-10T17:28:00.000-08:00

The Count

7 throw ups

6 poopy diapers

3 boxes of tissue

4 baby baths (not Asher)

1 pair of pants peed on

3 shirts snotted ( I change when they get soaked thru)

2 bedding changes

1 play pen thrown up on and washed

1 throw rug thrown up on and washed

4 loads of laundry

4 bottles dumped out

1 changing cover messed

1 dining room floor covered in puke

1 temp over 100 degrees

1 temp over 102 degrees

1 temp over 103 degrees

1 happy Bohdan who wants to be held

2 miserable bios who want to be held

1 snotty Yuri who does not want his nose wiped

2 sick parents

1 exhausted Momma

1 dead bird

and this was only today...

Ok "this was not in the brochure" (movie?). I was expecting tough but this is exponentially harder.

Cute things the kids have done lately:

Yuri:

I've started the play pen thing for him. I placed it in the middle so he couldn't reach the walls. He threw out all of his toys and shimmied the play pen back and forth until he reached the wall. He then proceeded to empty the card holder hanging there and then hung from it. I watched it all happen, I was amazed at his persistence.

Bohdan:

Loves to be held. He will put out his hand for you to pick him up whether you are near him or not. If you call him he will crawl across the room to you.

Asher:

He is a neat freak but I haven't figured out how his brain works. He took my basket of pens and emptied it onto my bed. I came in during the process. When I came back in to check on the status, the basket was back in its place except it was empty and I couldn't see the pens. I found them under Josh's pillow. ?

Caius:

I noticed he was waking up from his nap today and I watched him. He has a mirror in his crib and was laying on his tummy. He raised his head slowly up and turned to the side. Noticing himself in the mirror is grinned and turned away. Then he looked back. That handsome guy was still there and Caius smiled and laughed at him. This went on a bit. Too cute!

I will update you all about my Yuri thoughts later. I've been trying to nail down what one thing will send him into a tizzy faster than anything and I've concluded that is having a poopy diaper changed. Nothing will calm him, not music, not a bottle... I can't imagine why this bothers him so badly.

And the winner is....

2011-02-10T10:11:00.000-08:00

Here's the only pics I've taken lately. We were trying to soak up some Vit D to counter the yuck we all have. The were hanging from a tree in the backyard.

i'm so sorry for the delay. Only a few months late. :oD

I wanted to go through and make sure I hadn't left anyone out since I had extended and re-extended. I must have started a billion times then duty called and then I would forget where I was and then start over.

Anywho, there was 171 entries, I entered everyone into excel which gave every entry a number. I then used random.org to randomly draw a number and that person is.........

MARINA ST. KITTS!!

Thank you SO much to everyone who donated to the quilt giveaway fundraiser. $855 was raised for our growing family and that amount was matched and given to the older boys with DS fund, thanks to a generous family.

Answers and explanations

2011-02-08T07:32:00.000-08:00

First let me say thank you to you all for your advice and support. I really REALLY appreciate it. To answer some of your questions...

According to my fabulous Pedi- H-Pylori is tested for with blood. We haven't drawn their blood yet due to the fact they are so small and dehydrated. We are waiting for a little bit so when we try to draw blood we will actually get some blood. I would hate to traumatize them and not get anything.

Charissa- It was your pic of Ivanna with socks on her hands that gave me the idea about putting mittens on Bohdan.

Bohdan isn't sucking on his hands, he is biting them. He nails and fingers are all messed up. The cuts and callouses are still healing. Not to mention his finger nails are split due to his continued biting them. I have tried to give him a paci. That was torture. I have tried other chew toys of all sorts, teething tooth brushes, even an empty bottle but he won't have any of it. He will chew on his tongue which I suppose it better at this point. Small steps.

We know Yuri's throw up cry. Josh actually caught him before it last night and got him to the sink before it happened. Yippee! One less load of throw up laundry. Problem is that it was at least 2-3 hours after he ate. I'm trying to keep him upright but you would think I was torturing him. I fed him in the bounce and then gave him toys to play with but the toys were thrown and that dear sweet child lost it. If I didn't know better I would have thought there was electric current running through the bounce. I switched him over to a walker which is where he is self destructing right now. I say self destructing because he has thrown all the toys I gave him and is jerking his head back and forth trying to hit it on something while grinding his teeth. Now he is shaking his head back and forth. The walker does have a toy bar with music buttons that he is hitting with his hands and head. I think that is the only thing keeping him in there. I'm not sure it is going to be possible to keep him upright for 30 minutes to an hour after a meal.

Yuri is a hard egg to crack. The most we have come up with is that he wants to be in total control. Which would make sense being that for his whole life it has been him against the world. He is happy to see us and even claps when he is happy but that generally only has to do with a bottle. He HATES to be held and throws himself backward. I will try to hold him in my lap and rock and maybe hold his hand but the way he reacts you would think it was causing him pain. He fights diaper changes, nose wipes, face cleans, anything. and I'm not talking about a normal little boy fight. I mean it is the end of the world. He completely fell to pieces last night because he saw the other boys playing with a toy and he couldn't have it. When I say fell to pieces, I don't just mean fussing or crying, that would be a relief. I mean fussing and crying while looking for anything to hit or knock over including but not limited to bottles, bounces, toys laundry baskets, etc., while on his way to the wood floor to rub his head. Even though I don't allow him to do this he has rubbed all of the hair off the sides of his head. A lot of it came off during the flight home.

I'm trying to build trust with him but it is very hard considering even the normal day to day stuff send him into orbit. I am trying to softly talk him through these necessary evils so he will get used to them. It is hard to play with him with toys or with the other boys because he only wants to throw the books and toys and gets upset and flails if he can't. Which isn't fair to the other guys.

Please keep this little one in your prayers. There is something going on in his little body and I wish he could tell me. I do think he is very smart and will learn quickly once we can get whatever is bugging him sorted out and/or understood.

Things are getting better slowly as we are learning the boys cues and they are settling into their routines. It would be much easier right now if no one was sick. Both boys are very smart and test their boundaries often just to check to make sure they are still there. I think this is a good sign and shows that they are learning and I firmly believe that boundaries build security.

Gotta go!

few pics

2011-02-07T12:50:00.000-08:00

Asher, my super sick kiddo right now. I don't know if allergies are getting him or what but his eyes and nose are running away.

Eating pears. He was liking it. Don't know why the serious face.

He has been throwing up a lot... have a call into the pediatrician.

Pears are good!

Helping Mommy clean the kitchen. Yes those are mittens on his hands. Someone wouldn't keep them out of his mouth and now his whole chin is one big chapped place.

In his new outfit that Corey and Jenna surprised us with.

I would say something about why he was upset but he is often upset and it could have been any

number of reasons. I'm really looking forward to our neurology appointment next Thursday.

Bohdan in his monkey outfit. He was ready for a nap. and wasn't about his hat.

Sorry about the lack of updates. I have a few sick kids on my hands. Yuri throws up on the bedding faster than I can get it washed. Bohdan is doing well but doesn't like the new rule of 'no hands in the mouth.' Asher is miserable. And Caius is good but on the verge of being sick as well.

Parasite test came back negative. To my great surprise!! We are waiting to do blood work after the boys gain some weight.

My cup runneth over

2011-02-01T19:43:00.000-08:00

Guess who ate like a big boy? From a spoon... with no fighting or fussing. Guess who wanted more food? Any ideas?

Is it Yuri the 3.5 year old who has only been on bottles, who shunned the spoon last night and fought like crazy at the sight of it?

Is it Bohdan the 3 year old who after having his hands held took a little bite last night but didn't like it, who has also only ate from a bottle his whole life?

Or is it Caius, the 15 month old who used to throw up at the sight of a spoon. Who couldn't even have his hands touch the food without sending him into a throwing up fit?

Any guesses? Well you would be right!! They ALL ate baby food from a spoon. There was a little struggle at the beginning with Bohdan and Yuri but at the end of dinner they were all opening their mouths for the spoon and asking for more!!

This has been a huge answer to prayer regarding Caius and I didn't expect Yuri and Bohdan to take to it so soon. Thank you Jesus!! Thank you heavenly Father!!

first day by myself

2011-02-01T07:19:00.000-08:00

Double diaper change

What a ham! We went outside today and Bohdan was in the Johnny jump up behind Ash in this picture.

Yuri sat on the fire engine

Josh and Yuri was pushing Asher in the swing. I love this picture. they have the same expression.

During our day outing, Caius was in the swing.

The three muskateers, ages from left to right, 3.5 years, 3 years, 15 months

Yuri and Granma Di

Eating dinner.

We tried to feed Yuri but he just wiped the food all over his face. It did make for cute pictures.

Bohdan ate a little better than Yuri but still got it everywhere, so he needed a bath. When I saw Josh walk by with him I just knew I had to take a picture. Poor little man!

After the bath

Yuri is doing well about crawling. He crawled on all fours over to this toy yesterday and played with it while on his knees.

Yesterday was the first day I was alone with all 4 boys. You all must have been praying your guts out because it went well. We even had two therapist appointments for Caius.

Yuri threw up once yesterday but overall is eating like a champ. Bohdan eats but not as much. I wish I could tell you everything is perfect and wonderful but this is life we are talking about. I wish I could tell you that both boys are doing fabulous and taking to their new life easily. I wish I could tell you that I'm doing fine. I guess I could tell you all of this but I want this blog to be truthful and I figure you all have been with me through the other rough parts why not this. Good new is Caius and Asher are handling all the changes really well.

Needless to say I'm reading the 'Connected Child' again. If you have any thoughts about these behaviours please share them.

I'm just amazed that these babies are so skinny, malnourished, dehydrated and yet will throw their bottle and refuse to eat because the consistency isn't exact or because we aren't holding the bottle for them. Last night both boys were hungry. We know this because they were starting to self soothe. Josh made their bottles and neither would take it. Not even when Josh was holding them. So we added two more scoops of cereal and they both finished their bottles, Bohdan having to be held of course. They are very, very picky eaters which suprises me. At first I though their tummies were upset or they just weren't hungry. I made them a pediasure bottle thinking it would be some calories since they didn't eat dinner. I figured it would take some time for them to even want it but oh was I wrong. They both finished it in record time with no issues and no pauses. I realize they can't only eat only pediasure but you hate for them to skip a meal and that is exactly what they are doing. ??

Another thing that I think is strange is that no cup, bottle or bowl is allowed to be sitting upright. If either boy sees these atrocities they fuss, make a bee line for it and then knock it over, dump it out and in Yuri's case continue to hit it. Bohdan won't allow a bottle near him knocked over or otherwise, even if he is still hungry. But heaven forbid we take a bottle out of the room he is in. He can be full and refused the bottle, it can be an old bottle or Yuri's bottle and he will sob if a bottle leaves. Too peculiar.

The hardest thing for me has been how contrary Yuri is. He fights me on EVERYTHING!! Whether it is a nose wipe, diaper change, taking his bottle, getting dressed, etc. Even something good he fights and fights and then finally will give in. I understand both boys are going through a ton, more than I can possibly imagine. And I think it would be easier if Mt. Doom wouldn't have been so darn BIG! I feel like my patience needed some recovery time.

Both boys are showing progress each day. Yuri has been hitting his brothers in the head and face. We have been working on that. He is smart. Now he will look straight at me and go to hit someone but will stop an inch or so from their head. Today I was changing Asher's diaper and I hear Bohdan start crying. I run in and find Yuri smacking him in the face. Oi! He waited for me to leave. As I'm typing this Yuri crawled up to Bohdan and hit him. I called his name and told him no which usually will stop him but he just looked at me and hit him two more times.

Please keep the prayers coming. They are much needed.

Our first weekend

2011-01-30T17:06:00.000-08:00

The quilt giveaway ended today. However the genius typing this didn't figure the chip in correctly and it ended a day early..... SO if you were one of the ones wanting to get in on the give away and couldn't then you still have one more day. I will do the drawing on the 2nd. Sorry for all the delays! Oh yeah and I think I fixed the chip in.

Ok now on to babies!

Bohdan and Lyndsay!

Bohdan checking out the light. Very interesting!

Not sure what I was thinking by trying to get a pic with all of us in it. It was interesting.

Asher didn't want to be there he wanted to play chase under the palm. Yuri loves watching Asher especially when he gets close. Asher is having to relearn how to share. He is generally good but Yuri doesn't know how to play with the toys correctly and it irritates Asher so he will take the toys away.

Bohdan has become the new resident fuss bucket. He is so spoiled! He is so attached that he sobs if Josh or I leave the room. He is very sensitive.

Check out Yuri, trying to figure out Caius.

Caius is taking to his new brothers well.

Patty cake still a hit. Plus, don't know if you can tell but we are brushing the boys teeth and boy do they smell so much better. Plus I think they look better too!

We were out soaking up the sun while Josh cleaned the rug. Yuri is having some adverse reactions to something we are feeding him and has thrown up 3 times so far. My carpet shampoo is getting a work out. Anyway, while we were outside Yuri grabbed a hold of the hose and started pulling. He is very strong. He kept pulling and covered Caius with the loops. Caius didn't care, he joined in and then started chewing on the hose. I like this picture though because you can really see the difference between Yuri at 3 1/2 and Caius at 15 months.

first day home!

2011-01-28T16:05:00.000-08:00

This was the scene Thursday night after we got home.

my 3 year old and 15 month old.

Friday lunch. It was crazy!

Mr. Bohdan in a big boy highchair!

Yuri playing with a musical toy and holding hand with my friend Tracy who came all the way from New Mexico to watch Asher and Caius while I was gone. THANK YOU Tracy!

Tracy holding Mozart and Yuri trying to take the stick away! Sibling rivalry.

This was Friday. It looks like Toys R Us threw up in our living room.

Oh the bliss!!! We went to our pediatrician this (friday) morning and got a game plan for the boy's medical care. First thing is to get Yuri to a Neurologist and Bohdan to our Cardiologist, he has had heart surgery but has quite a large murmur. We sent in stool samples on the boys to check for parasites.

Yuri is doing fabulous! His sedatives have worn off and he is not just his usual self he is better!! He is playing and is taking to this family thing really well. Bohdan is taking it all in and is very tired. He isn't eating so well but I figure it will all take time. He is already very spoiled and wants to held all the time.

We took family pictures I will try to upload later. I'm having pic uploading issues yet again.

43 hours and we are home!!

2011-01-27T15:50:00.000-08:00

Oh my goodness and it feels so good. The worst part of the whole ordeal was the hopeless feeling and the uncertainty. By the grace of God we got out on one of the only flights that left D.C. today. This was after sleeping in the airport. The boys were not convinced that this whole America deal is a better deal. They are now decompressing. We got in today at 3:30 after going to Chicago.

Thank you for your prayers and for all the support from all you whom I never met. God has been so good to us through all of this. Thank you for all of you who were so willing to go out in a blizzard to help us. To those who offered your homes to us even though you don't know us. I feel the love of the family of God. I love you all and I'm SO happy to be home. I have a few pics from the airport I will try to upload later.

We were so blessed to run into so many angels along the way that scavenged the planes, the terminals and even the lost baggage claim for baby food. For those who brought us pillows, blankets, milk and water. Most of them were ground crew walking by on their breaks. I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of love from those of you who offered your help (you know who you are :o) sorry I haven't replied to your emails) and from those of you who helped us in the airports. We are truly blessed and I'm so excited to watch these boys blossom.

oh yeah, and thanks for listening to my whine. I am so glad God is still faithful when I lose it.

Mt. Doom just tripled in size.

2011-01-26T20:40:00.000-08:00

The flight from Munich to DC was wonderful. We had 2 whole rows to ourselves and things went so well. If we really were in the LotR it would have been like riding on the elphants. Then we got to DC... we were so excited! we are in the US. We only have one more leg to go. We get to see our families soon! After we get through security and such we learn our flight home, the last leg of our journey, was canceled due to weather. Continential

So United rebooked us on another flight with Continential and told us to run over there and check in. Here we go we get on the plane, Yuri of course is freaking out. All we need to do is get in the air and then we can put him down on the floor. The plane starts backing out..... then it stops..... then they tell us that a passanger is not feeling well and needs to get off the plane. The paramedics come to check him out. We wait. It gets hot. They tell us that the APU has failed and they can't run the A/C or start the engines without it. After 2 hours sitting on the plane they make us get off the palen saying they can't fix it. It was snowing so much that they couldn't push the plane back to the jet way. We just kept sliding from side to side. The they had to dig the jetway out of the snow.

This has been a nightmare, I can't even go into all the details. We have two seats out at 8am... I don't know.

Thank you for all the offers of help. As of right now we don't need anything. If we don't make that flight then it will be a different story.

We do need prayers. The boys are DONE! Robin and I had just enough energy, patience and stamina to make it home and now....

just frustration, exhaustion, and tears. not to mention two baby boys completely overwhelmed, exhausted and mad...

Please Pray we get out of DC!!!.

2011-01-26T15:18:00.000-08:00

Mount Doom - leg 1

2011-01-26T00:54:00.000-08:00

Well we are in Mordor and have started up the mountain. We are about 1/4 way to the top. I forgot to mention last night in my Lord of the Rings analogy that we have snuck around sleeping giants!

Anywho, we are in Munich. We left the apartment a little after 4am and our plane left around 7am. Josh called our pediatrician who gave me a dosage on the sedative we brought with us. It seemed high to us so we thought, we will give him have a half of a tablet (full tablet is a single dose) and then see how he does. 30-45 minutes later, the only change was that his eyes stayed closed a little longer when he blinked and he was much more aggitated. We gave him the other half of the tablet and started to board the plane.

Of course we have to go out on a bus and then off the bus and up the outdoor stairs to the plane. COLD!!! We pick up the boys and start to fold up the stroller. Now the stroller is new to us. Some fabulous family left a double stroller in country with our driver for anyone who needed one. I had gone looking for a stroller the other night and after going to 5 baby stores and mega markets I found nothing. So Niko suggested that we switch ours out with the double and Oh man I'm glad we did. This thing is a life saver. Both boys are doing well in it. Anyway another passanger comes to help us fold up the stroller. We learned the hard way that you can't fold it up while either seat is reclined. The man kept pushing and pushing and pushing. because of the language barrier I couldn't explain the problem and was pulling on the other end. I had covered Bohdan's head with a blanket and he was not happy. So my right hand is fighting to keep the blanket on Bohdan's head and my left hand and foot are fighting this guy to stop pushing on the stroller. So we finally get it popped out, the seats fixed and folded up. The man starts to put on the bungy cord and I notice that Robin is wrestling Yuri. He is beside himself. The cold and the noise of the plane was just too much. So we run up the stairs scooting by everyone and they were very nice to let us pass. Yuri continued all the way to the seats.

Robin rocked and soothed him but nothing was working. Then they turned off the cabin lights and he started to calm down. This of course was after a lot of dirty looks from people going out of their way to get up out of their seats to turn around and give it to us. We just shrugged it off. So its been over an hour since his last does and he is just barely asleep. If Robin moved her arm, which was asleep by the way, he would wake up. And not just wake up, he would wake up fighting mad and start screaming and kicking and flailing. She could calm him down and then something would stir him ( like the air conditioning come on and blowing on him) and it would happen all over again. Finally there was a little silence and then they turned the lights back on. Oi! He lost it. She would hold him close, let him just lay there, she tried everything and he was out of control!! I got another half of a tablet and gave it to him. Then him and I went to the back. I tried to rock him and he wouldn't have it. So we went to the bathroom. The stall had a changing table and I laid him on it. He was not happy but after a little bit he was soothed by the vibration. So I took him back and laid him on the floor and he fell asleep, still not a deep sleep but when he would wake up he wasn't freaking out. Poor little dude! What has he been on that this masive sedative barely touches him?

On a funny note, at passport control we had out all our passports. I tell Robin that I will keep her passport with the others in my jacket pocket. She agreed since she packed her jacket. Anyway, we get to Munich and they ask for passports... only three come out of the pocket! I look at Robin, she said 'Your kidding me!" I said ,"no" Now I don't know what look I have on my face but I am terrified. Obviously my face didn't match my feelings because Robin kept thinking I was joking. We started checking pockets and finally I found it. Whew!! Thank goodness..... then we noticed it was mine that was missing not hers!

Cool note, as we boarded the plain a man from the Ukraine asked if Bohdan has Downs Syndrome. I said yes. He said "I have a 7 year old son with DS!" WOW! He said that he and his wife are working with other parents of children with DS to help raise awareness in Ukraine. He mentioned the foundation they work with and said they are working on a scholl for their children since children with DS are not allowed in the public schools there. It was great to meet him!

Alrighty we are going to continue up the mountain, Yuri is passed out in the stroller and we leave 40 minutes, the plane ride will be 8 hours so hopefully he will stay asleep the whole time. I will update you again when I can!

Lord of the Rings

2011-01-25T12:08:00.000-08:00

So I don't have time to write this because I need to be packing, sleeping, showering and many other things that I'm forgetting I'm sure but I have to share because we have laughed about it.

BTW, I had to step over the man two more times each time he was in a different position. I slipped twice today, Robin was surefooted and I actually say a local fall. Made my day!

Any way so I'm skyping with Josh and he reassures me that we are almost home. I told him the following which is kinda funny since our friend Caleb Lococo blogged about the same movie and their adoption road to Julia here.

I feel like we are in middle earth. We have fought battles and encountered new species. We have held our ground. We have been away from home for so long. We have prayed. We are tired. We have made new friends. We have eaten strange things. We have explored. We have held onto faith during the uncertain times. We have cried. We have laughed. We have ran, slipped, fallen. We have gone through so much to get to where we are. And we are SO close!! We have one more leg to go and it small compared to the rest of the journey.....Just one plane ride across the pond to home. And yet I feel as though we have come through the black gate and we are looking up at Mount Doom. The last leg. The dreaded plane ride. As I'm saying this Josh is laughing and laughing at my analogy. He said you'll make it and I'll be at the top waiting for you with a big hug. I told him he better be careful I might be a little singed after going through all the lava on the way.

I hope you find the humor in this. We do. We are hoping and praying for tomorrow to be nothing major. And for both boys to sail through it. Thank you for your continued support and your prayers I will let you know how 'Mount doom' goes. LOL :0)

LAST day!

2011-01-25T05:58:00.000-08:00

Oh what a day! and its not even over yet.

we were supposed to be picked up at 9am our driver called at 8:05am and said to be ready in 20 minutes. After he heard the alarm in my voice he said 30 minutes. So we get ready really fast. Wake up the boys, feed them breakfast, change them and wait...... 9:05 comes around and our driver shows up.

We go for medical appointment. The doctor just kept shaking her head about the condition of the boys. By how small and malnourished these three year olds are. She gave me some suggestions as to where to start regarding medical care when we get back. One thing that eased my mind was she said the Yuri had had two skin hematomas removed, which explains these two massive scars on him. She kept saying severe mental retardation. I just smiled thinking you wouldn't say that if you knew them. I asked her for some medicine to give Yuri for the palne ride. I requested the same kind that Adeye gave Hailee to come home on. She didn't understand so we went to the pharmacy together. They must have opened 20 boxes looking for what I asked for. In the end she gave me an anti-stress and a calming sleep helper. She said they are very strong and Yuri is very little so use only little bit.

Well we do, wait.... nothing. Give a little more, wait...... nothing. Not even a hint of change. I'm glad we tested it today and not on the plane. I'm headed to another pharmacy now to try again.

While at the medical exams this man came by squatted down and started talking to Yuri, in english!! We were so excited! He said that he knew we were Americans because Robin smiled at him when he walked by. So that's the tell tell sign, not tennis shoes, or back packs, all though I'm sure they don't help, its common courtesy. HIs name was Chris and he and his wife are adopting a 17 year old and running into a lot of road blocks. They have been in the process since she was 15. They are hoping to come home on Thursday. Please pray for them.

We head off to the embassy and have to go through security. We knew what to expect so we were ready. We go through everything and then a guy comes out with a little strip of paper and runs it all along the stroller. ? He goes into a little room. When he comes out he asks if the children are on a special diet. We say 'no'. Then I say, 'yeah they are on baby food." Then he asks about it being special. No jsut regular baby food. then he says do you feed them powder ..... Yes their cereal is powder. He runs the stroller again, goes into the room and then returns and tells us we are ok. I guess they thought it was some other powdery substance. Robin and I just looked at each other in amazment. We have come so far and it could have all been ruined because they thought drugs were on our stroller. We just laughed.

We have our interview and the lady was super nice. She has family in Texas and then mentioned she has lived in Alamogordo, NM. Our jaws dropped! since Robin and our husbands went to highschool in a small town just a few miles from there. What a small world!! She could have been from anywhere in America!

In about 5 minutes the guy comes to the window and says Congratulations!! We got the visas, the passports, we are clear to go home.Robin and I were estatic. We were hugging each other, kissing the boys, and crying! It wa a great moment.

So we leave and have a long taxi ride back to the apartment. It is after 3:30pm when we get back and the boys are exhausted!! The only thing keeping them from a nap is 4 flights of stairs, by the way this is the first apartment that has not had an elevator, of course. So we are trudging up the stairs carrying the boys, our back backs, the stroller, wishing there was an elevator. We get to the third floor and we see it. We see him. He is a large man in his late 50's early 60's. He is dressed in a sweater jeans and jacket. There is a packet of cigarettes under his leg and he is out cold and snoring. He is sitting on the second step and his head is laying on the 4th step. His arms are splayed out to the sides of him. I stop look at Robin with wide eyes. She looks at him, then looks at me and we die laughing. You can't make this stuff up. there is no way we can get around him carrying the kids. Robin puts down the stroller and I give her Bohdan. I put my foot in the small space between his right arm and his body. I step over his arm and step next to his head. I throw my back pack on the landing and come back. Robin hands me the boys one at a time and then makes her way by the sleeping man trying not to step on him. We had dropped the stroller and had made noise. I don't know how he didn't wake up. We laughed and laughed about the sleeping man in the stairs. Only here.

Well gotta run to the pharmacy. We are meeting some other Reece's Rainbow families tonight for dinner and then in the morning we are catching a plane outta here. Our plane leaves at 6:45am arriving in Munich at 8:15am. Leave Munich at 11:35am arrive in DC at 3:10 and leave at 5:41 and arrive home at 8:26pm. Thank you all so much for your prayers!!! and for following our journey.

This Evening

2011-01-24T12:00:00.000-08:00

Thank you Jesus!! We got a much needed non eventful evening. Yuri was doing better than yesterday and we all just relaxed and played. Tomorrow we go get their medical examinations done and then hopefully pick up their visas. Here are some pictures to share our evening with you. Thank you all for your prayers, please keep them coming.

He smiled on his own when he saw Robin and her camera. It was wonderful!!

We were so proud of him that he didn't cringe or squint when he saw the camera.

We were trying to get a pic of them both smiling and laying together. Yuri was having a blast. Bohdan..... "he keeps touching me!" Which is funny because if we are wiping Yuri's face or something and Yuri starts fussing at us, Bohdan will grunt and put his hand out like "stop it!"

He will also come over and check things out if he thinks we might be bothering his brother. He is so protective and it is heart warming.

Skyping with Daddy.

day 947- I have no idea

2011-01-24T04:59:00.000-08:00

Sorry but I don't know what day we are on. Thank you for all of your advice, prayers and support in the comments. It means a lot to us!

The boys didn't go to sleep until 11pm last night. They slept all night which is more than I can say for Robin and I. It was freezing and we gave the boys all the blankets. To date we have only been sleeping with a sheet but last night we needed more. At 3am I got up and boiled water and put hot pots of water around our room but they didn't help. Luckily the boys were warm and didn't wake up until 8am.

Yuri picked up right where he left off. He fought the diaper change, getting dressed, he would sit still a moment and then start up again. We haven't found a trigger other than he wants to be in full control. We have tried everything that was suggested in the comments and they only magnify things. His music would only keep him still a song and then he would throw the phone. He won't keep head phones in or watch tv and the sleep aid I gave him didn't work at all.

Thank the Lord for the stroller. I don't know what we would do if we didn't have it. He will sit in there. He fusses and squirms and rocks, and bangs and throws what he can but it is a safe place for him to do this. He actually fell asleep in it today at the embassy.

Robin and I are done and done. We are looking forward to and dreading the trip all at the same time. Thank you for your prayers.

Oh yeah and Bohdan...... he is happy as a clam!!!

The train ride.....

2011-01-23T13:33:00.000-08:00

This was the picture Robin took this morning. What a happy guy!!

Both boys have been doing so good. I am so proud of them. This is a super huge change for them. The boys went down last night by themselves. Yuri woke up a little while later and it took me a few hours to figure out the problem but now I know.

They are eating well. They don't like everything we make which is just baby food in jars and cereal (this is what we were told to feed them per the orphanage). I tried to make them chicken stew and then I used a food grinder I brought with me to grind it up. I thought for sure they would eat it but no way. They eat stuff we don't expect them too though. Robin and I aren't being picky if they are eating we are happy.

We caught the 'day' train to the main city. I expect a 'day' train to arrive during the day. Nope, we arrived at 10pm. The boys were so tired and they wouldn't sleep on the train. Bohdan was his usual sweet laid back self and just sat in our laps. Yuri...... Yuri was not ok. He finally had had enough of the newness. He was beside himself. Fussing loudly, flailing around, hitting us and him. The train proved to be too much. He would do good for a little bit but then work himself back into a frenzy.

Please pray!! Please pray the plane rides are not the same. Please pray they are better. Please pray that he can handle it all and rest. That he will be content.